Shackled Joy

As far back as I can remember, I’ve been intimidated by strong personalities. In this new season of personal reflection and growth, I have come to realize it was the fear of courage and strength, so weird. Something I needed, and wanted... yet feared. I see it in others and wish that could be me, but it wasn't. Why?!? The enemy is very slick and patient.

Physical Fear: I grew up in a school where fist fights during the lunch break were a daily thing, bullies ran the hallways, assaults in our community seemed overwhelming. As a young girl, the fear was real and there seemed to be no escaping it. I knew it was just a matter of time before I might fall victim to the whim of evil. Watching the news was only affirmation that we lived in an unsafe and powerful world and strong people were threats to my personal safety. My soul was cornered by fear, terrified to live but happy to be alive if that even makes sense.
Over the years, I avoided people or environments that involved intense emotions, violence, power, anger, usually alcohol was center stage. Making the wrong move in public, saying something negative to someone, feeling angry myself, being around large groups, being around people who were drinking, hearing people argue, watching wrestling or boxing on tv or in real life triggered me into a flight mode. 

Emotional Fear: Becoming a Mom was the greatest joy and the greatest fear in my life. How was I going to keep my baby safe (physical) and make all the right choices (emotional)?! What if I messed up, what if other Moms saw my “less than” because my kids didn’t have the new trendy clothes, or didn’t like veggies, didn’t have a bday party every year, what if teachers judged me that my kids didn’t have a salad in their daily lunch or a homemade cookie or thought I was uncaring for not making cupcakes for the class on every party day. Fear always says what if you don’t measure up...everyone will know.

People pleasing was a coping mechanism to avoid arguments and conflict. I am a Lead with the Heart personality, yet inside fear was the guiding voice of all my “shouldas” and “havetas.” Decisions were made based on the presumed consequesnces if I didn’t do something rather than seeing the blessings if I did. Keeping peace and felling protection meant I was passive. Often, a doormat. It was just easier, so I felt. I easily followed and never led. Fear created what felt like a sort of safe zone for me. Power triggered fear. Strong personalities were loose canons to me. Loudness was intimidating. Parties and crowds felt like traps not quickly escaped.

Fear keeps us running circles around our own thoughts and controls our behaviors. Fear shrinks us but faith strengthens us. To be sure, I am a Christ Follower, I have faith...I just didn’t know how to have safe courage. Bravery, boldness, and leadership seemed like it was something everyone else had and some thing I just didn't have. The End. So I thought.

Fear has been a clever and quiet controller almost all my life. Perfectionism and people pleasing shaped me and guarded me even though my heart had hidden joy for life inside. The mask of Joy I wore daily seemed real. I had become really good at hiding insecurity and fear. Fear shackled my joy. Any decision that could involve conflict or failure were avoided to certain degrees in every area of my life. I still married, still became a Mom, still served in ministry and leadership but it was all done in shackled joy.

But God...The Lord is not going to sit back and watch His children remain shackled. We’ve been created for a purpose and equipped to accomplish it through Him and His strength, despite our weaknesses and insecurities because He is able, because He is Lord and He created each of us with a purpose in mind. His Grace is more than enough and we can walk in it boldly, confidently and powerfully. 

I used to fear-fear God. After all, He’s very powerful. But in His grace, and in the battle for my joy in the heavenly places I cannot see, He has been fighting for me. The very thing that terrified me, He’s been doing on my behalf, fighting huge battle to protect me, and not harm me. He has shown me that fighting is often necessary and righteous fear, fearing the right things is healthy. I am thankful for the gift of discernment I have always had to sense evil intentions but instead of the awareness crippling me, it now empowers me to be on guard and aware. There is a real battle for our hearts and our minds and we actually do have to fight. We should get angry about injustice and sin, while not sinning. We need fear in its rightful place under our feet. It can motivate us, but it will not lead us.

For us shy and recovering insecure girls, sensing power in ourself is scary at first. Those of you with bold, courageous personalities probably won’t understand any of this and it’s ok but I pray it opens your eyes to give extra grace to those in your life facing their fears, that you may lead by patient example, interceding for the release of the chains that hold them down.

Shackles are breaking and joy is being released! The weight of expectations, is so heavy. As Worship increases, so do Faith and Peace. Faith deepens our trust and when we trust deeper, we have Peace and when we have Peace, we have joy. As I learn to walk courageously against fear, my joy has increased. I recognize on this side of healing that fear is something that can shrink while courage magnifies joy, hope, faith and love. There is no joy in fear. If you feel scared, depleted, anxious, exhausted, cornered, judged, useless...you would be wise to check what you are bound to. A spirit bound to fear will drown but a spirit bound to Christ will soar. 

Friend, the Cross has set you free because of the blood of Jesus. The enemy knows this and is hoping you forget! This is why I blog and am kicking down walls fear built because I know I haven't been alone in this and I have experienced this beautiful freedom and can't help but share it to release the hold of fear for just one other person. I get it. Our minds are powerful things but the enemy seeks to control it and you must saturate yourself in The Word and dwell on the Truths in there. Once you wrap your head around the fact you are a Child of God, you have the victory in battle, you have the power of the Holy God living in you as a Believer...your world will change! The way you see it and the way you live it.

You are gonna have to fight! Yes, it will be awkward at first but it will free you! Fear can stop growing but you have to take charge! You have to step out in Grace and Faith with zeal and trust! You are more than a conqueror friend and there is more to this life than you just getting through it. You do have a purpose. Your paycheck, your title, your social media likes are not affirmation to your value. You are made in the image of God and were created for a life of purpose and hope, life and joy, peace that surpasses all understanding. You can walk through fire. You can do amazing things scared. Just lean into His strength and receive grace to make mistakes knowing you aren't a failure. You are simply figuring it out by faith. 

Ask the Lord to show you the people in your life who are authentically walking by faith and not fear. I would dare to say He has placed people around you with the iron sharpening tools you need but you've been too afraid to approach them and truly embrace relationships with them, because you're too afraid of being hurt or of failing in front of them. Cut off those fears and go to them. Share with them the journey you are on and let them see your heart. Ask them to be praying for you and ask for mentorship or wisdom in areas in your life you want to grow. I could not have done it without mine. 

Take courage and take up your iron. It's time to get up and gird up! Oh how grateful I am to have these iron sharpeners in my life, and some are unaware of their witness of example to me. I see them. They encourage me greatly.

Do not allow the enemy to shackel your joy anymore. Today, choose Joy. Today, stop fearing fear, stop worrying about measuring up to others or with others. Turn back your eyes to the Cross of Victory and look at the Empty Tomb of a risen Lord who dwells with you as you go and has conquered death. You are not alone and life will not ever be perfect and easy. But God. He stands near with outstretched arms to hold you close and show you The Way to joy, peace, and love. Love has set you FREE! Now walk in it!‬‬

Romans 8: "5 For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 

6 For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.

For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!" 

16 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 

17 and if children, then heirs--heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.

18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 

27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 

32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 

33 Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies. 

34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died--more than that, who was raised--who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 

35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 

36 As it is written, "For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered." 

37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 

38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 

39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." 

There are many verses in The Bible on fear, hope, courage, confidence and joy. Type whatever you are struggling with in the search bar of your Bible App or look in the index in the back of your Bible and start reading and reflecting on Truth! It is the Power to set you FREE!

“To me, though I am the very least of all the saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ, and to bring to light for everyone what is the plan of the mystery hidden for ages in God, who created all things, so that through the church the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places. This was according to the eternal purpose that he has realized in Christ Jesus our Lord, in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through our faith in Him.”

‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭3:8-12‬ ‭ESV

A Pace Setter

 I confess. At first, it annoyed me. Coming from the big city outlined with freeways 4 lanes wide where vehicles took the speed limits as bare MINIMUMS, driving through a small town with only 1 lane in either direction...where everyone went the EXACT speed as was posted, was annoying to say the least. And it didn't matter that we gave them a little "push" as we stared into their mirrors and closed in the space gap between our car and theirs. They didn't budge. 
These cars held their place, at their pace, which happened to be the right pace, a seemingly sloooooooow 40mph through most of the highway, so it felt. Until we moved here and the seemingly sloooooooow one lane highway was now our highway. 
In our little town, there are hardly any traffic lights which means it takes great precision and caution to get across the mostly steady flow of vehicles. School buses and city buses make their stops along this small town highway. We must be careful and curtious traveling through town being aware of pedestrians, animals (iguanas, peacocks, ducks, Key Deer to name a few) and other vehicles trying to make their way to the other side. 
40mph still seems too slow whenever I am running late (that hardly ever happens, lol) and when it is the time of day when there aren't many cars out and the open road is vast...you wanna go fast. But, there are also times when the 40mph seem too fast during high traffic times. Funny, now I find myself annoyed because people are pushing me to go faster. Oh how the tables can turn! 
Now that this small town is my small town, I am thankful for those who have held their place and held their pace. I know just as the big city drivers attempting to "push" their way through have had their patience tested (I can testify to that truth), so has the patience of the locals (I can also now testy to that as truth!) been tested. Now as a local resident, I know the roads, I know the community, I know the cautions to be heeded, and that is why I will hold my place, and my pace. We, the locals, are the pace setters for this community. We wisely hold our place and our pace, because it is for the common good. "One who is wise is cautious and turns away from evil, but a fool is reckless and careless." Proverbs 14:16
I believe God instructs us throughout Scriptures to be Pace Setters. "Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us." Titus 2:7-8 He tells us to be wise, guard our ways, encourage one another and sharpen one another, mentor and teach the younger generations His Ways. God sent Jesus as our Pace Setter. He shows us The right Way, Romans 8:28, for the good of those who love Him. He held His place, and went His pace. 
As we mature in our faith (just as in life), our understandings, knowledge, and history strengthen our faith, our beliefs and our resolve. Wisdom is our hope, setting our place and pace in this life. Wisdom lays foundations which are thicker, roots that are deeper and faith without boundaries. We are not as easily "pushed" around, tossed to and fro.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9
Bless the "local" Pace Setters in this world! The ones who bless our lives with accountability, teaching us and mentoring us in The Word. Those who step out and speak out in faith daily, walking in a way that is pleasing to God, and not man. Bless those who are strong and courageous in this life. They seem so few and far between. Some of us are trying to find our place but have no pace, and some of us have a steady pace but in the wrong place. Oh, to be in the right place, at the right pace, to steady a shaking world, to keep things moving in one direction when everyone else is trying so hard to get around you. Don't you wish you could be a Pace Setter too?!? For the glory of God?!? I can't help but think, as a Christ Follower, aren't we all called to be a Pace Setter, for the good of our "community" in a watching world...and for each other, as iron sharpens iron?

Lord my God, You are the King of kings, our Righteous Ruler and Ultimate Authority over all things, people and principalities. I praise Your Holy Name. Thank You God for the example of Your Son, Christ Our Lord, as The Ultimate Pace Setter in this world. May we too be found as Your faithful followers, and leaders, Lights in the darkness and Salt of the earth. Keep us strong Holy Spirit, leading us in the Way of righteousness for Your Name's sake. Lead us away from temptation to conform into this dying world and renew a right and clean heart of endurance and strength within us. Be our Shield and Shepherd against the folly of evil one as he seeks to turn us away from You. Give us wisdom as we seek Your face through faith as we grow in knowing You personally. Guard our thoughts and steady our resolve. Set our place. Set our pace.
Thank You Lord for those who have boldly and courageously chosen to be a Pace Setter in Your Name, to show us our place at The Cross and teach us the pace of Your Spirit. Those who stand as one of Your "locals" and hold their place at The Cross, moving at the pace of the Holy Spirit. Bless them and use them to teach those of us who desire to be stronger and more courageous, for we believe You are with us wherever we go and it is our desire to walk in a way that brings honor to You. Forgive us when we get out of pace with You, or when we choose selfish ways. Our Rock, our Redeemer, our Refuge and Resolve, our place is with You. Strength and quicken our pace with Yours, amen.

Happy 5 Year Anniversary Birthday to Me!!!

Happy 5 year Anniversary of Freedom to me!!!!! I never really used to focus on my bday, it was mostly for the kids~ cakes and cards, laughter and fun. But, birthdays should be celebrated, as we look back and ponder lessons learned over the past year and cherish memories made, and let go of past failures. As much as I "hated" that dreadful year, I celebrate what God had done to bring me to that place of nothing, so I could have everything!! 
For those who haven't followed me from the beginning, and don't know me, I went through a tough season, aka A Season of Hell, as I suffered with panic attacks, anxiety attacks and depression. It was incredibly tough and for those of you who have had one, or who also deal with anxiety, you know. My life at this point had to become very purposeful, guarded and intentional. There was a lot on the line, my marriage, my family, my reputation, my very life...my witness of who Christ was to me.
After TONS of testing, counseling, healing oils, new eating habits, vitamins, exercise, quiet times/meditations moments, research, breathing techniques and a very intentional prayer and scripture memory season, my thirst was once again quenched by The Living Water and my heart made healthy on feasting on my Daily Bread. The bondage of fear was lifted, the chains were broken and I was Free Indeed!!! I felt lighter, literally. Emotionally and Physically, the burden of pain that weighted my heart and soul nearly all my life, had been lifted. No longer did I live with the "What if (blank) happens?" and controlling fear. My entire life had filtered through, "What if."
I began that process in December 2008 and through every thing intentional- physically, emotionally and spiritually, God gave me freedom. And what a perfect time to declare it than on my birthday, that April 4, 2009! On my own, I had learned that what I had been doing was called exposure therapy. I went from fearing the planes flying overhead, declaring I would never fly again, to celebrating the step that I could actually go inside an airport again! My husband was floored when he walked out of the walkway to see me standing there, inside... at the gate with the kids to pick him up. It was a huge victory! It took a week of laps around the airport, looking at pictures, to get me there. Eventually, I flew short flights at first, even a little prop plane with 4 seats and I had to step up, on a ladder...on the wing just to get in it....oh my goodness that is a whole other story for another time!!!!!!....and lots of scripture cards in hand with oils all over me to get to that place. Since then, I have logged many miles with some more stressful than others, but praise God, I have risen above the clouds and to God be all the glory!!!
I also graduated to higher floors in the elevators and handled crowded places better and got back on a boat. So, I, being the list person I am, I set up the final test and we headed to Galveston for an overnight bday celebration! We stayed on the top floor, rode a boat, went under (and lingered through the anxiety till it stopped) a tunnel and stood with my toes touching the window, looking over out my window, on the edge! No panic or anxiety attack!!! WOW and AMEN!! I know this seems trivial and maybe even ridiculous to some but it's okay. Another thing I have had to learn is acceptance for where I am at any time on my journey in life, and letting go of the fear of judgement. My victory is not your victory. My milestones may be your landmarks and that's okay. I have come to accept and appreciate how we are all uniquely, "fearfully and wonderfully made" created for His purpose and glory.
So, here I am 5 years later, still with smaller thorns in my flesh but praise God, a flesh without chains!! I still have to live a very intentional life, even though I get lazy sometimes, I admit. But my heart desires to be pure before the Lord, my heart to encourage and minister to others is strong. It has been through this pruning and uprooting in my life that my strong-will is a blessing. I fight to be stronger, to be Proverbs wiser and sharper, to be healthier for His name sake and not my own. 
I will never forget that desperate December Day in 2008, crouched on the floor, when I gave myself over in absolute depletion to my God and uttered, "I can't do this anymore. I cannot live another day like this, in this pit alone without You. Please just bring me Home with You." Although I have many stories of moments like this where God revealed Himself to me, this one I will never forget. After months of void, He returned, my Shelter over me, my Shield and my Refuge, my Strength and my Hope, He returned. I felt like Job. "Please God, no more here. I just want You." He was always there. It was in that moment, I felt Him near and He spoke to me saying, "If you want to encourage others in my Name, how will you do it if you are not even here to do it?!" I sat frozen for a minute, it had been a long dry wilderness since I had felt Him and especially heard Him and this was a drenching rain on my dried out "soul." My reply back was, "But I have nothing anymore, I can't. If You want me to do it, then You have to help me and do it for me." And the healing journey began. 
I began moving forward and not backwards. That's right where He wants us, living on His breath, His strength, His wisdom. What I felt was the end of my life, was actually the beginning of really living! Oh the stories I could share and I pray that my blog has encompassed many of them. I blog to encourage and to remember, for myself and for others.
I no longer see myself as broken and shattered pieces. I have been made whole and am held together by the grace and mercy of my God. He is my glue. His Word is healing to my flesh. Without Him, I will fall apart and on those days I am lazy, my pieces begin to rattle and I am quickly reminded of my Glue and how I must guard it. I do not want to fall apart again. I do not want to leave open doors for satan to get a foot-hold, so I must live intentional, standing firm on the foundation of Christ, guarding my heart and mind and spirit in the Name of Jesus, and that victory is His! There are testings and prunings that will continue to shape me and test me to make me stronger, I have those as we all do. But I pray that these 5 years have at least taught me one thing, God never moves out of our reach. Like Peter in the boat, God grabbed his lifted hand before he sank. He is near to us just the same. He will never leave us of forsake us. I pray and confess my unbelief will be quickly redeemed and restored to active belief.
For the past 5 years, I now celebrate what has happened and say Thank You Lord, but I also look forward with hope and anticipation at what is next in every tomorrow as I live intentionally for every Today!! I don't want to go back to yester years. Me today knows the Lord better than ever before, loves Him more than ever before and looks forward to each day I breath in His grace than ever before. Not every day is blissful and full of roses, but every day God is God and that is my victory and joy!!!!! He is worth living for!
I still say "Better is one day in Your house than thousands elsewhere" Lord Jesus. You are my everything and my heart and hands lift to praise You alone, my All in All, my Prince of Peace and Mighty Healer, Provider, Protector, Abba Father, Caring  Friend and All Sufficient Savior. There is none like You, and I don't want anyone else but You. You are my Lord, my King, my God, my Refuge, my Redeemer, My Strength, My Everything!!! Amen.
Our encouragement from Romans 8:

"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2 For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 3 For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4 in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. 5 For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6 For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.
18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. 27 And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. 28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33 Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died--more than that, who was raised--who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written, "For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered." 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Getting Past the Bumps in the Road

Well, little guy has done such a great job without his training wheels, we decided to take some neighborhood bike rides and one of them was on the bayou. The bumpy bayou. As I rode behind him, I gave him navigational instructions like going around certain stumps, watch out for dips, look for trash, etc. Then, we trailed through some loose gravel and he began to stop in the middle of all the rocks and he couldn't balance and get through it. He came to a complete stop and couldn't easily get going again. As I said, "KEEP PEDALING!! You cannot stop in the middle of the bumps because your tires will loose their grip and have a hard time getting back going through it," I felt the lesson pressing into my soul for me. "Yes Michele, when you get to the bumps, keep pedaling and don't stop or you will get stuck too. You have to keep moving forward or you will slip or stop."  Oh how true. 
It had been a very difficult week for me, a bumpy month actually, and I faced lots of bumps in my road. I was moving forward as usual and then came upon some bumpy roads... and I hesitated, not sure if I could go through them, so I slowed down, lost my balance which took me a while to get back going and get past the "bumps" in my "road." 
When we are going through life and we approach the bumps, may our first instinct not be one of panic. We know we must get through them and we know we can get through them if we go carefully, without stopping! The scene from Finding Nemo comes to mind "just keep swimmin' ." With confident assurance, we must continue to navigate through the loose gravel before us and get to the other side of the mess. If we stop, 1.) we will not get where we need to go; 2.)  though it's possible, it makes it very difficult to get started in the midst of the gravel.
The next time I approach bumps in my road, I hope to keep my confidence, and sound wisdom, knowing I can get past them if I will simply hold on tight, carefully passing through, without slipping, stopping or even speeding through like a loose cannon 'cuz that can make you loose control quickly! Just keep pedalin', Just keep pedalin'!

"Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man. Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.
My son, do not lose sight of these-- keep sound wisdom and discretion, and they will be life for your soul and adornment for your neck. Then you will walk on your way securely, and your foot will not stumble. If you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden terror or of the ruin of the wicked, when it comes, for the LORD will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being caught." Proverbs 3:5-18, 37-46


Lord, keep us strong, confident and steady on the road marked with suffering. We cling to You. Lead us straight through in peace and confidence as we desire to trust You with all our heart and acknowledge You as the keeper of our path. May our foot not be caught. What Satan intends for evil, You oh Lord, intend for good. We bow our hearts, souls and minds to You, our Faithful God and Father, our Savior and Friend. Thank You for our healing and the refreshment You bring to our bones. You are worthy of all our praise and our cup overflows. Thank You for Your patience and forgiveness when we hesitate. Help our eyes stay fixed on You alone. We will follow You. Help us be faithful. amen.

Better at reading people than books!

"And I, when I came to you, brothers, did not come proclaiming to you the testimony of God with lofty speech or wisdom. For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified. And I was with you in weakness and in fear and much trembling, and my speech and my message were not in plausible words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, that your faith might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God." 1 Corinthians 2:1-5

This personal testimony encourages my insecure heart to be one of courage. I don't consider myself one of academic smartness, rather life smartness. I tend to navigate the things of the mind, the heart, intuitions easier than things of intellectual equations. I am better at reading people than books! As I have gotten older and have a desire to learn, it is much easier to spend hours reading and studying; however the thing of which I am reading, my Bible first and foremost, then Bible studies, not for proofs of science but understanding the love of God, what faith looks like, honoring and serving the Lord and others. The very title and beginning of this blog, Where Faith Is, is still the center of my heart, as my fears and doubts bow their knee to my faith and are overcome by the Gracious Name of Jesus our Lord! 
I do not consider myself a strong leader/teacher but I am a strong Believer! I do not jump at the chance to "teach" but given a chance to "encourage" I will leap!! (Of course I say that and I have nearly thrown up before I lept!! lol) Over the years as I have sat under the teaching of incredibly gifted teachers in the public arena as well as in my very own churches or community, I am blown away at their knowledge and graceful and exciting speaking abilities. Then, I find myself wishing "why can't I be that good?" And two things come to mind, 1.) God has given them this call and they have been gifted and equipped, and 2.) They are speaking from the heart from Where their Faith Is about what they are passioned about. It is soooo obvious when a person is teaching "material" or "testimony" from the heart. 
One who teaches or encourages from their heart has a fire lit up within them. You can see it and feel it! My husband lights up the minute He starts talking about sports. My teen lights up when you start talking about trucks. My other son lights up when he is challenged in theory. My daughter lights up with dance and music. My little guy lights up at the mention of cupcakes! Me, I light up when I hear about God. Nothing fires me up more than when God gives me a front seat to His demonstration! His healing! His miracle! His overcoming! His joy! His peace! His testimony! His LOVE!!! Here we go!!! Don't get me started...heehee!!!
I sat with one of my sweet mentors recently and she shared with me her nervousness about an upcoming speaking opportunity. Immediately I laughed, You? Nervous? Come on! You are one of the strongest, most obedient women of God I have ever met. How can you be nervous?! I just don't have it down myself. God touched my heart with these scriptures. What God wants from us is not perfection or accomplishments to testify, but  for us to testify of His Love, His help, His abilities. The wisdom to share is our testimony of Christ, not "lofty speech" or "plausible words." What a relief!! I can do THAT! I love when God allows us to encourage our mentors back and you see that little smile within their heart of gladness:) Seriously, what an honor to ignite that flame of hope and belief even in the strongest of them all!
When we share what God has done in our lives, or is doing, it ought to be a "demonstration of the Spirit and of power," not our intelligence. So, I can let go of being fancy in my words and simply share from the power of my faith deep within my heart that is consumed by Him! I don't want people to hear me speak of my accomplishments in my marriage, my parenting, my friendships, my ministry. My heart for encouragement is (hopefully) a demonstration of God's amazing Love for us. I have not arrived at the other side of victory at every one of my weaknesses, but I can testify where I have found my strength, my reasons, my whys, my hows on my journey towards healings and victories! I can show you where I have been and where I am an and where I am going!! 
No one, not even the wisest person you think you know, has it all together. May we be careful as Believers not to only share what we have been healed from, but Who our Healer was. Not how we became strong, but Who is our Strength. Not how we conquered victory, but Who is our Victory! Not how we have rest in our soul, but Who is our Rest, our Peace, our Comfort.
May we testify of His glory and wisdom alone so that our "faith might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God." If you rely on me, I will let you down. The world will let you down, but GOD, He is faithful!! Let Him be your wisdom in all things!

God help us to share, teach, encourage one another in the pure Gospel of Who You are. Help us resist the temptation to over explain, over analyze and over teach. You are more than enough! May Your Word be our Healing, our Hope, our Joy. Lead us Holy Spirit closer to the heart of God so our testimony will reflect His wisdom and Way! May our lives, our healings, our blessings, be a demonstration of Your love and not about us! To YOU be ALL glory, power, rest and strength. By faith, we come. Amen.

Salt in my Bible

Evidently I didn't clean off my table very good the night before! I know you are probably not surprised, no claim to fame over here as a Super Cleaner, lol! I noticed it the next morning when I picked up my Bible off the table to go my morning study, and there they were, salt granules stuck into the back of my leather Bible. Great, eventhough I wiped off all the salt, it left bunches of tiny markings all over the outer cover. Great, a holey, Holy Bible...kinda funny actually!
Who knew salt could leave marks...and then my spirit stirred, of course.....it should. God tells us in Matthew 5: "You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people's feet. "You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven." We should be concerned if our salt isn't leaving impressions on the "things" around us. God calls us to be the salt and light. He says, "You are the salt...Let your light shine...so they may see and give glory to God."  As a Believer in Christ Jesus, you have salt to make the world around you saltier. You will leave "holy" impressions. Just as iron sharpens iron, the more salt and light, the saltier and brighter our life becomes, thus more glory to God! 
Interestingly, my days got busy and I am just now returning back to this blog and had wanted to upload a picture of the back cover of my Bible. You know me, visual girl, but to my surprise, the hundreds of little pits were gone. Completely flushed out. The leather eased itself back to the way it was. So, no pictures, but I did get what was meant to be Part 2 of the lesson God was/is teaching me. Although we have been given salt and light, we can loose our salt and light. (Not salvation, but our impact.) And if we loose our saltiness, and if we loose our light, how will we make an impact on the world around us? How will God receive the glory if we aren't even reflecting Him? What impression are we leaving, if any?!
So, if we can get our minds and hearts around the fact that we already have been given salt and light within, (this can be a hard concept to accept for those who struggle with insecurity, low self-esteem, or those whos' faith and trust in God has not been deeply rooted), then how do we remain salty and bright?
I am thankful to be a part of a church that teaches you how to be "holey" as we give glory to a Holy God. God has blessed me personally with some seriously Salty Sisters. You know how when you go to the beach and the second you step out of your car, you can taste the salty air? That's the impression I have when I get close to these women! Plus, you almost have to put on the sunglasses when they speak and serve unto the Lord! Their saltiness, their light, makes holey, Holy impressions in my heart, mind and soul. They certainly season up my life!!!
So, how do we remain salty? Deuteronomy 10:12-14 gives us a list: "And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways, to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the LORD, which I am commanding you today for your good? Behold, to the LORD your God belong heaven and the heaven of heavens, the earth with all that is in it." 2 Peter 1:5-8 also encourages us "For this very reason, make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with steadfastness, and steadfastness with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they keep you from being ineffective or unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ."
Increasing in saltiness means remaining steadfast in the Lord. His Word is life. Be faithful and consistent. While this is a personal thing that only you can do for yourself, you will also be salted when you are around salty people just like when you show up at the beach! Refresh yourself in the Light and Truth of God's Word, fearing, walking, loving, serving Him with all your heart and soul, making every effort to supplement your faith and walk close with others, growing and glowing!
Believer, do not let your light dull. Do not loose your saltiness. God, restore us, we want to glorify you through our lives. Help those of us who are weak in our faith, to draw strength once again in our hope that we truly are Your salt and light in this world. Forgive our laziness. Forgive our unbelief in You.. Help us to remember that Your Holy Spirit dwells within us and that we can be a useful instrument of Your love. Guard us in Your Light that we might be brighter to shine for You in this dark world. May our salt and our light lead the Way, leaving impressions that last. Help us to not become lazy or dull. Make Your Word alive once again to us. Help us to leave a holey Holy impression. Thank you for those you have placed in our lives to light up our paths, those that add lots of spice and flavor to our life and those who shine so bright for You! Replenish them and bless them Lord! Thank You Faithful Lord, amen.

How are YOU doing? It's easy to judge other's, but what about us.

REMINDER: My blogging is meant to be a tool of remembrance, for me personally and for the reader...the public venue of blogging allows me to share these testimonies with you in hopes somone else will also be encouraged. I refer back at times in my online journaling in a call to remember what God has and is doing in my life.
If you were led here, then there must be something for you. There are no coincidences. Here is part 2 of my study today...going to print this and use as a further study at another time.
Blessings, Michele


From The Ministry of Encouragement:

How does God want us to relate to one another in the Body of Christ?

Romans 12:10—Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Romans 12:16—Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to asso­ciate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.
Romans 13:8—Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one an­other, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law.
Romans 14:13—Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother’s way.
Romans 15:7—Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.
Romans 15:14—I myself am convinced, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of good­ness, complete in knowledge and competent to instruct one another.
Romans 16:16—Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ send greet­ings.
1 Corinthians 1:10—I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought.
Galatians 5:13—You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love.
Ephesians 4:2—Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.
Ephesians 4:32—Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 5:19—Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord,
Ephesians 5:21—Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Colossians 3:13—Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
Colossians 3:16—Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God.
1 Thessalonians 5:11—Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

In short we are exhorted to: honor, live in harmony with, stop passing judgment on, love, accept, greet, instruct, speak to, submit, forebear, forgive, teach, admonish and encourage one another.

Please Wait...Warming Up!

Sunday I was needing to make some copies for the kiddos and I had just enough time to make them. Afterall, I only needed 8 small copies. I could do that in 15 minutes, for sure.

Trying to save time, I headed to the downstairs copier which I hardly ever use. I clicked the button and it displayed "Warming up" on the panel. Hurry, Hurry...only have a second to warm up, I've got to go!!  As it warmed up, I got my papers ready to go....but I could not find the by-pass tray for my card stock. Well, maybe it handles both types of paper through it's feeder. Nope!! Paper jam! I soooo didn't have time for THAT!

I quickly took care of the paper jam and ran upstairs to the use the copier I was familiar with and could almost work on with my eyes closed! Cardstock in the by pass tray, 8 copies please..."Please wait. Warming up..." What?!?! I HAVE been waiting and you should already be warmed up Mr Big Copy Machine!!! I was surely out of minutes now!! It was just 8 copies I needed!!!

Anger at the machine filled me, as if it was the machine's fault that it was doing what was necessary to get me what I needed. By this time, I was sure that my group had gathered and I was missing out on the prayer time, more anger but this time at myself for not just coming up here to begin with when I knew it would get the job done. I put my hands on the Big Copier and took a deep breath, angry yet knowing I was doing all I could. In that pause, I began to  feel the calmness and correction of the Holy Spirit in that moment. 

Peace be still. 

Do not sin in your anger. 

Wait on Me. 

Be patient. 

All things work together for good.

The copier had to have that warming up time to work properly. After what seemed like 300 minutes, the display changed to "Ready." At the push of the button, copies were made and my task was done, making it downstairs to the bowing of the heads for our prayer time. Gracious God.

How much more efficient would we be if we too had a "warming up" period. Each time we approached a decision or situation a display read, "Please wait. Warming up...." Wouldn't we benefit in our efficiency if we took the time to wait and warm up, waiting on God to say "Ready." 

I was reminded today of a few things:

* While trying new things can be good, there are some truths that we must stick to so we don't end up in a "jam."

* Be careful who you hold responsible for your thoughts. They are yours afterall.

* Take time to "warm up." There is a reason athletes warm up and stretch before they compete, so they don't get hurt. Take that time to pause, take a deep breath inhaling the wisdom of God into our mind and soul.

* Wait till HE says you're "Ready." We should neither rush ahead of God or drag behind.

Father God,

There is no one as long suffering as You. Your patience and endurance are infinite. To You, time has an eternal view but for us, it's ticking away. The older we get, the faster it seems to go. Until we find ourselves in Glory where there is no timeline, help us manage the time here on Earth efficiently, in our bodies that are wasting away. Help us to wait and not rush the tasks You have before us. In our "warming up" periods, we ask the Holy Spirit to give us self-control in the moments that seem to take longer than we want them to. Help us trust You and Your perfect timing for everything we face. Your ways are good. Your ways are right.
Thank You Gracious God for having the Way and the plan for everything we face today and forever. Help us learn the discipline of "warming up" in You. In Your Son's Eternally Faithful Name, we pray, amen.

Psalm 25

"To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul. 2 O my God, in You I trust; let me not be put to shame; let not my enemies exult over me. 3 Indeed, none who wait for You shall be put to shame; they shall be ashamed who are wantonly treacherous. 4 Make me to know Your ways, O LORD; teach me Your paths. 5 Lead me in Your truth and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; for You I wait all the day long. 

6 Remember Your mercy, O LORD, and Your steadfast love, for they have been from of old. 7 Remember not the sins of my youth or my transgressions; according to Your steadfast love remember me, for the sake of Your goodness, O LORD! 8 Good and upright is the LORD; therefore He instructs sinners in the way. 9 He leads the humble in what is right, and teaches the humble His way. 10 All the paths of the LORD are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep His covenant and His testimonies. 

11 For Your name's sake, O LORD, pardon my guilt, for it is great. 12 Who is the man who fears the LORD? Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose. 13 His soul shall abide in well-being, and his offspring shall inherit the land. 14The friendship of the LORD is for those who fear Him, and 

He makes known to them His covenant.

15 My eyes are ever toward the LORD, for He will pluck my feet out of the net. 16 Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. 17 The troubles of my heart are enlarged; bring me out of my distresses. 18 Consider my affliction and my trouble, and forgive all my sins. 19Consider how many are my foes, and with what violent hatred they hate me. 20 Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me! Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in You. 21 May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for You. 22 Redeem Israel, O God, out of all his troubles."