Alone Time, Together

Sometimes you need a little Sista time but we always need a little alone time. Jesus leads us in example throughout the Scriptures of Sabbath rest, and prayer times both alone and with His disciples. These days it seems nearly impossible to find alone time, between the day's activities and access to enough social media to occupy an entire day. 

There's much to keep up with in world events, and technology is constantly changing. I suppose we are afraid of missing something should we step away from the spotlight for a few minutes, Lord have mercy, a whole day. Then, when we finally do get to that place in our day to take a break, in any amount, we feel guilty and selfish taking time away from all that we could or should be doing.

It’s one thing to do it excessively and to the detriment of your work, home and self, and “running away” from your circumstances is not an option here. I’m referring to a specific moment of aloneness. It may be early morning or late night moments, 10 minutes sitting in the car at the grocery store or parent pick up, or during a lunch hour at the park. 

Maybe you’re able to take a day every month or a weekend once a year. We are all at different places in our life seasons and abilities to get away but what we have in common is the need for purposeful resting alone. Time to clear our minds and be still in our moments with the ultimate goal of worship. 

Our culture doesn’t allow quiet so you must fight for it. We can get apps and alarms and appointments 24/7. We must choose it. I love girlfriend lunches and coffee dates, time out with the family and at the same time, I need free time for just me. It wasn't always that way in my life. This was something I learned the hard way.

After so many years of going and going, never putting myself in my top priority list, I finally broke. My body, mind and soul fatigued out. The strive for perfection, the constant worry of making right choices for my 4 children, serving in my home and at the church, taking care of the big ol house myself, was too much. I didn’t allow myself to ever rest physically, emotionally or spiritually. I lived busy and full, happy and blessed...just very, very stressed. 

The expectations of self were sky high and unattainable. As an encourager, it's funny to me how much grace I was able to extend to others, and not myself. No one had to prove anything to me yet I felt like I had to prove myself to every one, and as an insecure girl, that's a crazy cycle to live in because there never was a point of feeling valid, and so it went. Always striving, never attaining.

December 2008 will forever be a mark of time in my life story. God implemented a forced rest to say the least which I resisted hard in the beginning. During this forced period of unrestful rest of panic and anxiety attacks, I had to learn the discipline of stillness and breathing in grace. Even there in the quiet house, it was loud and suffocating. 

Here in this season, I learned to sit by still waters despite sitting in the darkest of valleys. To feast on the Bread of Life when my body was wanting to reject nourishment and simply quit. When I was still, and the Word of God was pouring into me, grace abounded and love for Peace Himself filled me and revived my soul. As someone who was a giver by nature, I learned how to be a receiver in spirit. 

I wish someone had told me in my younger years how important these moments of alone were to the human soul. Not only to clear the mind and settle the physical body in rest, but in these moments to allow God to pour into us where we have need. Being alone and being still is a sacrifice. It's not enough to turn off the TV while you do laundry, or listen to your audio Bible app while you are getting ready for the day. We need to give ourselves permission to stop. 

Set a timer if you must so your mind can be at peace. The hardest part is the constant nagging impulse to get up and be productive, such a lie from the enemy. There is nothing more productive that a moment of stillness in our heart, mind and soul focused on our Lord. 

Learning to be still gave my body and mind time to heal. These became the precious moments the Lord was able to speak to me where I could hear His whispers. I hadn’t realized how little I actually listened for His voice in my prayer life, especially throughout my day. I've always been a praying girl, asking, sharing, talking to the Lord, but listening was more of waiting for the moment He might send lightening to strike in His discipline towards me and if I could say Amen and nothing happened, I was grateful. Kinda funny to think of it on this side of time and maturity. 

Take time starting today, to practice being still with the Lord. Before you do, make sure however, you have met with Him first in His Word, it is your Conquering Sword and Salvation Helmet to think on the things of the Lord, and not meaningless or taunting thoughts. 

Allow yourself time to listen, don't be afraid and don't feel guilty for this is Holy Ground and God is with you. Throughout the day, set the tone of grace in your home and live it out, with yourself and others. Recall His Word to you that it may overflow as Light in darkness, a Light house for those seeking refuge in stormy seas and surrounding darkness. 

“You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.

 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 

In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." Matthew 5:13-16

This is why I blog, to encourage and to remember as living stones in my rivers and valleys. To share life journeys Where Faith Is. Life is not lists and chores and accomplishments, striving for perfection and accolades. Our lives are meant for worship and Grace, to reveal the Hope of Salvation in this chaotic world. He is our Rescue here and forever. I certainly don't have many answers, but I know The One Who is The Answer. My prayer is to be a Light, an instrument of praise for Him, for He has done great things and is a fortress that cannot be shaken. He has healed me, praise the Name of Jesus and broke many chains and I believe He can heal you too. Being alone in my daily disciplines, fuels me as much as sipping coffee with a sister over the Word and I would like to think I am a better Wife, Mom, Friend, Woman because of my heart resting in His. We all need to dwell in Him, alone and together. At the end of time, this is all we will have and all we will do as Believers in Jesus...to worship by Grace in the stillness and person of Jesus our Lord. (Although as much as I think we will be standing hands and hearts lifted, there is sure to be some dancing!! Oh I cannot wait!!)  

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

Father God, thank You for your amazing Grace. You are more than enough and in Your name, we are strong enough to walk out the day with You in mind and purpose. Holy Spirit, renew our minds in The Words of God and steady and straighten our steps towards righteousness. Forgive us when we busy ourselves all day and are not mindful of You. You are our source of power and peace, thank You. Draw us near to You and keep us in the shelter of Your wings, as we navigate valleys and meadows in this life. Thank You for the period of forced rest but Lord may we listen well to Your voice as our Shepherd and walk graciously in step with You that in our submission and love for You, we follow You and heed Your voice. There is no greater Sacrifice than the One You have poured out. Forgive our petitions for lavish lives and let us desire a life of Love and Hope, with eyes set on Your Kingdom, serving You, giving and receiving that others may know You through the sharing of our faith journey. To You be the glory and honor and adoration, amen.

I love all things worship, but here these are some of my favorite Go To worship songs if you are looking for a place to start:
Be Still by Kari Jobe
Oceans by Hillsong/ Elenyi
It Is Well by Bethel Music
Peace be Still by Lauren Daigle
Come to the Altar by Elevation Worship
What a Beautiful Name by Hillsong
Broken Things by Matthew West
O The Blood by Selah
Hills and Valleys by Tauren Wells 
I Got Saved by Selah

He Likes Me

This morning I was listening to a sermon about serving two masters. It's one of those "common" principles spoken in Christendom. We must choose between serving the Lord or Self. In "self" there are hundreds of idols, positions and people our flesh want to please. Being that God's Word is alive and active, a two edged sword, it fell fresh on my soul once again and the processing and praying began flooding my soul.

Growing up, the heart of my home was a generous one within strict boundaries. My Dad is a Retired Army Colonel so you can imagine the expectations and rules. My Mom is a creative, make something out of nothing, fun, people person. These influences shaped my heart and mind for 18 years, and still today. My parents would always say "Don't worry about what people think," "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all," "Leave this place better than you found it." Typical southern manners, be polite, make a difference and don't ruffle feathers.

As I gathered my thoughts to share this with the kids for our morning devotional, I realized how much more it is than just "don't worry what other people think." Yes, I think it's part of it, but the whole focus is not impact on self, rather the resulting impact on God. Turning our focus onto Him first. Seeking first His Kingdom and Way. Seeking to please Christ alone. When we focus on pleasing the Lord, we loose the need to focus on pleasing others, therefore we need not worry about their response to us, to like or dislike, approve or disprove. Of course this is not a permission to be offensively rude or give no care whatsoever. We are the workmanship of God and Holy vessels in service to Him. 

True freedom comes when we let go of the need to have anyone's approval, even from self. My Dad was tough on us girls, but in the end, no one was tougher on me than myself. As a glass half full personality, I desired everything beautiful and lovely and that's how I saw my world from a young age. As I grew older, my world got smaller and people were not always lovely. Evil seemed more prevalent than good. My southern (by birth) and encourager heart (by spirit) wanted to change this world for the better, believing it was possible to cheer on and love someone into a changed heart and life. To encourage them to hope and change. And when it didn't, the disappoint was self realized. "I must have not been encouraging enough or done it the right way. I have failed God." It wasn't even approval I desired from the other person, but desired results, which in a round about way was self-affirmation to a job well done...or not.

For years, my pursuit was encouraging others to faith and courage to dare to believe they were capable to be change in this world for the better and well. When you feel like a drop in the ocean, it's easy to give up and accept the thought "you're not enough." My immature faith and false identity slowly shifted. I believed I could not make a difference in this world. People didn't seem to truly need me, my cause and case for a better world calloused my heart of hope. 

My own enemy, I constantly felt like I disappointed God and the results were unworthiness of grace and blessings and dwindling efforts to try, and yet there was no one I desired to please more than my Lord God. Results appeared to be failure in every part of my life, therefore no longer would I try to encourage or please others, or self, because I determined ahead of time my inability to make an impact. My spirit was quenched by fear and anxiety, insecurity and unworthiness.  

Satan had taken my thoughts and taunted me for years of inadequacy and unbelief that God could use me or that I would actually be pleasing to Him. I desperately hoped for the moment everything would change in who I was, that I no longer would be this shy, dorky, silly, insecure, ineffective, unintelligent, can't girl. What I didn't see was the plot to deceive me straight from the enemy. 

While I cannot change people's hearts or lives, because only God has this ability, His chooses to use our willing hearts and empty vessels of truth and love, because of His ability and our lack of agility. Only God can change hearts, it is not in our power to defeat darkness, but it is His. It is God who changed this world for good when He gave His one and only Son, paying the debt we could not. The moment He died on the Cross and rose on the third day, we were given the anointing of  Love. We just need to choose to walk in this hope and victory, in Jesus Name. 

For years upon years, I had felt inadequate and unimportant as an encourager in this life. My life was full of vivacious, out going Godly women whom I was thankful to serve with and that seemed to be enough for me to feel a part of the bigger plan. At least I could follow directions, be a part of something awesome and not worry about results. While my heart longed to be "good enough," to please others in my family and community, most importantly, God, I accepted the (lie) fact that this was just who I really was. In the back ground was my niche. Not to lead or impact, but to clean up, set up and shut up. God loves a servants heart and I did that very well.

My faith became works based to please the Lord. Eventhough I believed with all my heart He loved me, I knew He must have also been disappointed in my lack of results. Endlessly, I "worked" to honor Him in everything I was. It was exhausting. Always striving, never achieving.

Satan is so clever in his schemes. If he can keep us focused on all that we aren't or can't, we will never see all that God can and will do through us. Who doesn't want to change the world, have a happy social life, feel needed and necessary, be the perfect child, Mom, wife, friend, volunteer, co-worker? The need for love and approval is built into our nature. It's this desire that causes our souls to search for Love. God is the Love calling for us, not man and all the empty promises of this world.

With God, all things are possible. It has taken many years to learn this lesson, but how thankful I am for the freedom in Christ to know His approval is all I need but the real lesson is the reminder that His approval has nothing to do with our ability to earn it. His approval is a Gift of Grace. He loves us because we are His, not because of anything we have to offer. 

I would like to think I have been a blessing in the lives of others but the need to know that no longer is a concern for me. How I pray to be a seed spreading, root enhancing vessel of love and hope and encouragement in this life, so that others will know Grace because they have met Him through me. 

One day the Lord will judge and show me all I have done right or wrong, and until that day, I choose to rest in His grace and unconditional love, knowing that I sit here willing and open, ready to let Him pour in me and bless me with the opportunity to watch His spirit work through me, not because of me. 

My heart desires God's heart. God simply desires mine. How beautiful and peaceful is this Good News! I rest knowing that if He used a donkey and a rock, I am truly able to be used by Him too! 

“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 

In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." 

Matthew 5:14-16

Life of Grace

You think you're happy until one day you smile so much, your cheeks hurt. You think you rule your world until the day your world turns upside-down. You think you're faith is everything until Jesus reminds you He is everything. 

The presence of God sends chills through the tiny hairs on your arms and you learn it's the presence of your Spirit rejoicing from the inside out. You think you can do it, until God shows you how He's gonna do it. You think you have enough money, until the unexpected happens. You think you will live a full, long life until that tumor appears. 

We sure do a lot of thinking. 

The world is full of assumptions but one thing we do not have to make assumptions about is our Lord Jesus. According to the Scriptures, Christ Jesus is the Cornerstone, our strong Foundation. The Lord is our Redeemer, King, Father, Refuge, Friend, Shield, Answer, Protector and Sweetest Love. He is faithful, just, righteous, steadfast, enduring, long-suffering, gracious, merciful and mighty. In the simplest of human languages and definitions, these are the characteristics and promises of Our Savior which hardly do justice to defining an infinite God. He's so much more than we can think or imagine. 

All knowing, all seeing, all able, ever present is He. It is written, He is LORD over all. All our worry. All our fear. All our plans. All our blessings. All our bodies. All the principalities. All. He is All.

"However, as it is written: “What no eye has seen, what no ear has heard, and what no human mind has conceived” — the things God has prepared for those who love him— these are the things God has revealed to us by his Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. 

For who knows a person’s thoughts except their own spirit within them? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. What we have received is not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we may understand what God has freely given us. 

This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words. 

The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit." 1 Corinthians 2: 9-14 NIV

Ecclesiastes reminds us there will be times for everything in this life. As countless as the stars in the sky are the numerous variables on this side of Heaven for you to be able to figure things out and have an unshakable, fortified plan outside of living by faith, for grace, by hope, with trust and in love.. In the economy of God A + B does not always = C. But rest assured Jesus + God + Holy Spirit = Life. E v e r y  s i n g l e  time.

Whatever you are facing today, seek the Lord. With Him you will have life. With Him you will have peace and joy even through tears and questions of sufferings. He is our Healer and Counselor for all the hurts. Life is not fair or predictable. But God is. We are weak, but He is strong. Don't forget, there is an enemy working against you, to keep you from experiencing a gracious and joy-filled life. 

So, how do we live by faith and feel purposeful and ready for whatever comes our way? By spending time leaning into God, learning who He is through daily Bible reading, fellowship through Bible studies, in songs of worship, and by the testimonies of others of like-minded faith. Arming yourself with His armor and not just your plans. Knowing who God is, the One you are placing all your hopes and fears in, the greatest Love of your soul, waits ready to meet with you and reveal His love to you every day. You will find Him if you seek Him. He isn't seeking your lip service and He isn't fooled by our masks.

He is am amazing God who saves sinners by grace, who extended the Peace offering, with grace. Your sins and my sins have earned us an eternity in the lake of fire and gnashing of teeth, but by the Grace Giver our Lord, He sent His Son to pay the debt we owe and we are found in Him righteous. Wow. That's everything. We have redemption forever in Him. We have life ever lasting in Him. Today and always, we have comfort, peace, joy, purpose, in Him. He is the same yesterday, today and forever, amen! Will you choose today, to accept and live in this life of Grace?

"For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." 

2 Corinthians 4:17 NIV

Prayer: Father God, Lord over All, we pray according to the Scriptures we may be found faithful in You..."Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything. 

We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians, and opened wide our hearts to you. We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us. As a fair exchange—I speak as to my children—open wide your hearts also." 

2 Corinthians 6: 4-13 NIV May it be so, amen. Here is where we live, not in the black and white, rather Where Faith is. 

Worship in Song here: