Crowbar of Grace : Feeling Lonely When You are Surrounded by People in Life

It was a perfect evening for a Jeep-Hair-Don't-Care Jeep drive. The winds were cooler, the sunset emulated a fire in the sky providing a Hollywood-worthy backdrop for a drive. I took the soft top and doors off and headed out. There's nothing like it! To feel the wind in your hair, and not care how messy it gets, to feel a sense of extra freedom and fun.

This evening though I felt a special sense of awareness, being pulled in my spirit to really being in the moment. I admit it's been a busy few months of intense focus and work. I have hardly slowed down accomplishing more of the To Do List than Ought to Do List. 

Driving through town, the sky was glowing, lights illuminated driveways and businesses, my hair was swishing around in the wind. No, no music playing. Our old jeep doesn't have working a/c, heat or radio. It truly is a basic ride without expectations. I took in a deep breath reaching my arm out the side of the jeep in a moment of worship of thanksgiving, feeling especially free and kept by my Savior. I felt His nearness. I knew He was riding with me. My soul was at joyful rest in my hot mess. 

And then I smelt it. A full aroma of yummy deliciousness flooded my air. Mmmm...I had come into the local restaurant area and the aroma filled my senses. I hadn't been hungry but now I found myself starving. My spirit spoke in that moment, "Girl, how wonderful to taste and see the Lord is good." In that moment, every sense was heightened, the sense of sight, smell, feeling. Yes. Oh the beautiful freedom of tasting and seeing, and knowing The Lord our God is so good. He is a delight, even better than chocolate and my favorite lattes. My God quenches every thirst and feeds my soul like nothing else can. The bestest of friends, the yummiest of foods, the greatest of incomes cannot compare to the richness of our Lord's glory and presence alone. 

It was a perfect evening for a no doors on Jeep ride, smelling local flavors and the salty air. Pulling over to a sunset gazing spot, I sat still in reflection, realizing how often I have quenched the Holy Spirit in my life with "closed doors." 

If I had been in my Mom car, the Burb, windows and doors closed up, I wouldn't have experienced all that open air goodness. You know how God takes these everyday moments and peels back a layer of our heart to speak some truth into it? This was one of those moments.

Insecurity, inadequacy, fear of failure and judgement, lack of self confidence keeps our doors under lock and key. We can live life surrounded by people yet still feel lonely. 

Each betrayal, each failure, each regret and disappointment was another click of the Lock Doors button. It's always been easier to polish the outside of the car and keep it locked up without fear of the unknowns letting others in. Isolation becomes your safety zone, yet it’s a danger zone. 

Friend, the enemy is always at work to isolate us. When we are hidden and disconnected, our fire simmers and we become lukewarm and less salty.

But God, He didn’t create us for isolation. He came to set the captives free, not to shut us in behind closed doors. Jesus came to seek and save us from the shackles of death and desolation. He opens closed doors with the crowbar of grace, mercy and love. 

Ultimately, His Love unlocks our doors and Grace is the gatekeeper. The Lord who opens the floodgates of glory divine, revealing to us how He is doing a new thing and He can't wait to show us. If we would just trust Him to open our doors.

God places crowbars of grace in our lives to help us get out from behind those doors. He not only sent the Holy Spirit as our Helper, but He places in our lives, friends with keys, faith and hope that can open locked doors that lead us towards Him. 

Always keeping it real, I am still a guarded girl, trust and healing takes time and comes with learning healthy boundaries. I choose who, when and where because I ask God to lead the way and open those doors for me. You can too! It’s time to pray for God’s help to open those doors and enjoy the beauty of Salty Air with your Sisters & Savior!

"We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;" 

For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:8-9, 17-18  

 "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,  for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind." James 1:2-6

With hopes of empowering others in these rooms, I do my best to be transparent and honest, but I admit, I am guarded, however, I know it is He Who is a shield about me. My hope, my fears all rest in His care. Our flesh and our enemy will never stop showing us open doors for us to hide behind, in hopes that one day we won't be paying attention and walk in and sit for a while. Even on those days you do, there's always a crowbar of grace and it will be up to you to know where it is and how to use it.

Friend, do you need a crowbar of Grace today to get out from behind those doors? Let Him open them, He is trustworthy. You don't have to fear the other side of that door. I know it looks scary but you can trust Him. The winds and waves know His name. He sculpted out every path you will walk on and will walk with you. Step out from behind those suffocating doors. You are not safe there. Let go of that self control and open your soul's arms wide and honestly proclaim it is well with your soul even when it hurts, His breath sustains yours. He will take you for the ride of a lifetime. He is trustworthy and will be the most powerfully consuming delight you will ever know.

Enjoy the Messy-Hair-Don't-Care of Christ's reckless love. Surrender to the moments He gives you and embrace the good and perfect gifts He has for you in every season. Strength is in His Name. Freedom is found knowing He is by your side and His heart is for you, not against you. How He must delight in the sweet aroma of our return of worship as our souls pour out praise and see the proof of a life free from isolation.  

 
Open the door, take the ride, stretch your arms wide and show the enemy where your faith is, then Taste and See that the Lord our God is good! 

"Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him!" Psalm 34:8

Thankful for Being Perfectly Imperfect

November is the traditional month of Thanks-giving. Social media fills the airways of stories and events in people's lives and in history that are filled with giving thanks, where they were blessed beyond measure, given or won something they couldn't imagine or saved from something that could have destroyed them but didn't. This is true for me too. Every November, like everyone else, I reflect daily on the blessings God has poured out on me. The list is nearly endless. From family to friends, to provisions, to the active and real presence of my Lord, I give abundant thanks from each glory to glory.
Thanksgiving comes naturally in the midst of the current goodness or blessing but sometimes our thanksgiving comes from a place of deep pain or heartache. We are thankful to no longer be in pain anymore. We are thankful to have been saved from something, be it physical, emotional or spiritual. Remembering these moments are bittersweet. Painful remembrances yet remembered for the redeeming love that brought us through them. Bittersweet.
As many of you know from reading or hearing of my own testimony of God's refining rescue in my own life, November is that month of bittersweet reflection for me. So many times in God's Word He tells us to "remember" and "give thanks in all circumstances." As much as we want to forget times of pain in our lives, the valleys we had to crawl through served to build our spiritual muscles, the fires that burned us, didn't consume us but purified and refined us. I would never choose to walk through another valley or be tossed into a firery pit so it behooves me to take personal inventory of my life to make sure I am doing all I can to stay out of them. 
Like Paul, I asked the Lord to remove the thorn from my flesh several times and the Lord saw it best not to. I can't help but think God wanted him to feel that twinge of a reminder lest he ever forget that bittersweet place in his life when God saved him. This was true for me too. I have moments in my heart (literally and figuratively) I feel that twinge from the remnants of the thorns that once pierced me.
I am brought back to September 2008 when our ladies Bible study was starting back up for the Fall Semester. The study was He Speaks to Me. For months I felt like I hadn't connected to God. I felt too busy, but a good busy. I just wasn't hearing Him and this study was advertised for just a person. I was breaking my back to be the perfect Wife, Mom, Friend, Church Servant. I was actually breaking my heart, and God's. My anxiety and perfectionism drove my high expectations of myself, as well as trying to be a perfect reflection of a Proverbs 31 woman who served her family, friends and community with perfection. Only to find myself frustrated and failing constantly. If I got one thing right, I missed 3 others. If I got the Wife of the Week Award, I got Worst Mom Award the same week and visa versa. I would get up and start the house cleaning, pushing the kids out the door for school so I could get to working and then feel the shame and loss of missing what I really wanted the morning to look like with a hot cooked breakfast, hugs and prayers. Or I would spend all day cleaning the outside yard and doing laundry only to be too exhausted to play with them when they got home...and then there were the bathrooms and picking up and cleaning the floors, running errands, trying to squeeze in a devotional and on and on. Sooooo much to accomplish and I just couldn't get it all done. I felt like I was on autopilot trying to get it "perfectly perfect" each new day. I thought, "One day...."  I would get this whole Wife, Mom, Friend, Christian woman life right...but that day never came. And no wonder I felt distant from God. I was too busy with my own list to consider His. I was so concerned about my own perfectness, I missed His perfectness. I feared my failures instead of fearing my God.
My thoughts screamed at me constantly to try harder and do this and that. There was no silence or rest to hear what God had to say. And yes, I worshiped throughout the day, jamming out to my Christian music. And yes, I prayed as I thought of someone of something I needed to pray for. And yes, I attempted to do my Bible study lessons for the week only to cram in a few days at a time to make sure I didn't show up without answers. I wanted to reflect God perfectly and my intentions perfectly, so I made sure that by all outward appearances, I had it together, proving that as a Christian woman, I...we...really could "do all things in Christ who is my strength." Phil 4:13. However, it was breaking my heart, and God's. 
I couldn't seem to find my own way out of this performance cycle and God stepped in to give me a hand. My study book actually went missing during Week 2 homework. How embarrassing is that?! I lost my book? After two weeks? Good grief!! I did not want to go back to class but I was responsible for leading the worship time each week. I had to still show up. Ohhhh, I thought of excuses to hide, but I wasn't going to lie in order to hide. Filled with complete embarrassment, I went and sat with blank paper and pen. My teacher and friend offered me a weekly email with the Scripture verses that I could look up and write my thoughts down and I would at least be able to stay on topic with the ladies. 
The first day I sat down with her email, shaking my head, I opened my Bible to read and reflect on each scripture. I felt a small stirring in my spirit. Each day that week, I remember feeling excited to look up the next set of scriptures. I realized that over the years, I had gotten really good at doing Bible studies, without the Bible. I dug deep and took into consideration what the author was trying to teach that day, making sure I got the right answers and not really ever needing to open my own Bible to honestly find what God was trying to say. (One reason I don't like when authors write the verse for you in the study book, replacing the need for using a Bible. It spiritually spoon fed me. I didn't have to work for anything or discover the Living Water personally. I got sips of theirs.) I had forgotten or maybe gotten too distracted or maybe even too lazy or too busy and was forgetting who's word I needed to discern and dig deep into.
God's Word is a healing balm and it refreshes the soul. I began to thirst for it every morning, even if I didn't get to it till the afternoon time. Oddly enough, the very last week, I found my book. It had been kicked under the computer desk, don't know how or by whom, and I just had to laugh. God had obviously taken it away from me so that I could truly do a Bible study. I realized then, I needed to be in His Word, literally.
Eventhough my desire for His Word was ignited again, I still was attempting the "perfectly perfect" life of a Christian woman of God who did all things with joy, grace and perfection evidenced by her well kept home, healthy meal planning, well behaved and respectful children, a smiling and adoring husband with a  smile on her face all the while I was screaming and dying on the inside of all my trying. My heart was failing. My spirit was defeated. My mind was spinning. And yes, I was still praying but my prayers were for help...to be perfect in all that I felt I needed to be and do. And yes, I still worshiped the God who was my source of all....perfection. My strength in my weakness. Oh how deceptive and slick evil is.
One day, December 6, 2008, God turned off my autopilot and put me in neutral. All of a sudden, my life had lost control. The tight hold I had on my life was gone. Through a very dark season of fear, crying out from the depths of darkness, trying still to keep the face of faith on, I quickly found myself in a pit of nothingness. I imagined myself being overcome by the quicksand of life, slowly sinking further and suffocating in the end. I was drowning in my soul. I saw no rescue. I felt no peace. My hope was breaking to pieces just like my heart. My faith was shaking just as my mind was tossed back and forth. 
But why?!? At the time, I didn't understand why this was happening. My whole aim in life was to do my best at being a "perfect" Christian woman of God. To make the right choices and do all the right things for God, for myself, for my family, for others. And there it was. I was trying to be perfectly perfect at being perfect, concerned with how I appeared to God and to others rather than being concerned with how I appeared to God and how God appeared to me. My life was a series of To-dos that needed to be done with perfection instead of a life of To-be that needed to be done for for the glory and pleasure of a Perfect God. 
Satan constantly reminded me that I was imperfect, never able to measure up to what I thought I should be. I felt shame, embarrassment and guilt at the truth of this knowing I could never get it all perfectly right. But God.... He stepped in and reminded me that I am perfectly imperfect in His name. For the first time, I felt grace and mercy at the truth of knowing that while I could never do all things or be all things perfectly, that in Him, I could stand before Him and rest knowing that I was made perfect in Him through my imperfections. 2 Corinthinas 12:9-10 "But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 
God took back control of my life and with His gentle yet firm hand, He lifted me out of that darkness and set me back on level, steady ground, my sure foundation! I felt my breath again. For the first time, I felt perfectly perfect, to be imperfect. My thirst for Living Water refreshed my heart, soul and spirit day after day. I woke up early in the morning to give Him my first fruits. I began and ended my days in thanksgiving for His healing grace, His strength despite my weakness, His grace despite my selfishness and pride, His unconditional love and acceptance for this imperfect girl. 
I no longer sought perfectionism in me. I no longer feared failure. I could finally find rest in my Perfect God. The shattered pieces of my heart, soul and mind were gathered together, and refined by His Fire. I realized how "me" centered my life had become when all my heart really wanted was a "God" centered life. The Pharisees had the same issues. While they knew God, they lived life according to the rules and to-dos and completely missed worshiping and knowing God's Himself, knowing His love personally, living with hope, joy, peace, love, trust and anticipation. They were on autopilot to stay the course and obey the rules, doing all kinds of good and making sure they played the part of righteous ones well. They missed the mark and lived a "me" centered life even though I bet if you asked them, they would probably would have said it was most certainly a "God" centered life.
It took months of prayer, being in God's Word consistently, meditating on His Word, embracing His love and forgiveness, seeking accountability, desiring His will for my day and not my own, to finally and truly be free from the bondage of "me" and becoming free indeed!!!! 
While the valley has thorns and the fire leaves scars, they are beauty from the ashes to my heart and soul. They remind me of God's great love and compassion for His children and how He desperately desires us to know Him, not just know of Him. Not just do things and be things in His name, but to do and be things because of His name. 
If I want to boast about God and experience His power resting on me, then I will "boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses," and learn to be "content in my weaknesses." Not easily done when you are a recovering perfectionist!!! But it is possible with a healthy dose of humility and God's power!!! I think I had it backwards all those years...I was concerned about displaying the potential of Me as a Child of God instead of the perfectness and potential of my God. My Potential vs. God's Possible....I am perfectly imperfect but God is what is perfectly perfect. Satan wants us to only see the truth of who we are to shame us and cause us to drown in our own quicksand, but God stands as our Protector and Shield reminding us that in Him, we have been given power in Jesus Name to overcome and enable us to be more than conquerers in His Name. There is no condemnation in Christ Jesus and nothing can separate us from His hold on us! (Romans 8) I am imperfect, "all have sinned" so Satan is right. But God....He redeems us and washes us clean, making us perfectly imperfect in Him! "And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways, to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the LORD, which I am commanding you today for your good?" Deuteronomy 10:12-13 
I hope this reaches the drowning heart of another person who feels like they can hardly breath. You feel like you are on autopilot. You are running so fast that you don't feel like your feet are touching the ground sometimes and if they do, it is because you have fallen hard. May I encourage you to take a deep breath and breath in the grace of God's overpowering love and exhale all your efforts. You think you can keep going and doing all the good busy stuff you want or need to do and do it all in the name of Jesus, but if you don't stop and place yourself into His care and purpose of being and doing, and get Him truly at the center of you, He will gently but firmly save you from yourself, but let me tell you, the fear of that darkness will not quickly be forgotten. Much better that you heed warnings that you are approaching quicksand before you find yourself suffocating in it. It is much better to fall on your knees than to be brought to your knees...I promise you!!! And yet how bittersweet that once we have been on our knees, we will once again stand!!!!! Bruised and blistered, yes... but not destroyed!! Refined, not refused!! Loved, not lost!!

" But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; " 

2 Corinthians 4:7-9

If you have lost your thirst for the Word...if you feel like you do not have control over your days...if you feel like you are going to scream...if you feel like God is far away...if you feel there is no hope and you are sinking in quicksand...if you feel alone and forsaken...you feel like a complete failure...may I gently and firmly remind you that both God and Satan are at work in your life and you have to decide who's voice you will listen to and believe. Satan is the Father of Lies and God is the Father of Love. Satan wants to destroy you from the inside out but God will heal you from the inside out. God has not forsaken you. You are perfectly imperfect and greatly loved. You are not alone. You are not a lost cause. There is a Redeemer name Jesus Christ who has come to set the captive free and it is in Him you will find your strength, joy, peace beyond measure. Reach out and take hold of Him again. You must pray, put on your armor and fight for your life in Christ. Right now, there is a battle for your heart, soul and mind that you cannot see but you are probably feeling so you must believe that you are more than a conquerer. Victory has already been declared on the Cross and it is yours to receive! You do not need to give up the fight here on earth to end the chaos and pain. Our Redeemer lives. Peace is here now! The King of kings and Lord of lords, the Ruler over all things, people and principalities stands strong guarding His children. Get into His Word, the Living and Active, 2 edged sword, and let Him heal and help you out of the darkness. His "word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path." Psalm 119:105 You cannot give up or quit. You must replace your "me" centeredness with God at the center again. Fall on your knees and cry out to Him in all honesty and faith, believing He is who He says He is and can do just as He has promised in His Word. Do not doubt His love or ability, and do not doubt that you are worthy of His love. God will be your rescue but you need to do your part and be willing to be rescued. Pray. Seek. Believe. Hope. Surrender. Reclaim your life in Him and live the life He has planned and purposed just for you. Look up Friend and stand once again on steady ground, a Sure Foundation because He is that Foundation!! If you do not have the strength to reach up, then reach out and ask for help. The Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf but God also calls others to do the same. You may have been too much into yourself to look out an notice the hands and feet of God reaching out to you. Open your eyes and see that the Lord is good and He is near! Do not be afraid to take off the Perfect Mask and reveal yourself to others. Be authentic and real. Be careful who you trust and seek out those who will love you through Christ's love and care. Remember, you are strongest when you are the weakest, it just may not feel that way yet!! 

"And he said to me, "It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment. The one who conquers will have this heritage, and I will be his God and he will be my son." Revelation 21:6-7

My name is Michele, and I am a Perfectly Imperfect Woman of God!

Do you "get it?!" I sooooo want you to!!

"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, 7 rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving. 8 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. 9 For in him the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily, 10 and you have been filled in him, who is the head of all rule and authority. 11 In him also you were circumcised with a circumcision made without hands, by putting off the body of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ, 12 having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead. 13And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, 14 by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. 15 He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in him." 

Colossians 2: 6-15

This morning, I grabbed my camera as I headed out the door to take the kids to school thinking I might stop by a nearby beach and "play" with my camera. What a beautiful place to play!! How can I share with you the beauty of that moment? I was intentional with my angle's trying to get the best shot, showing the most of the scenery, the everchanging view of the skies. A storm seemed to be brewing in the short amount of time I was out there on the pier. Within 15 minutes a double arc rainbow appeared, a cool breeze began to blow, and the textures and colors shifted intensely around me, in every direction, enhancing the gorgeousness of the moment. It was breathtaking and awes-inspiring.

My sweet friend called me when I was in the middle of taking in these moments and though I described all the colors, sounds and movement of the world around me...in that moment I have no doubt she could not have understood exactly what I was experiencing. It wasn't real for her. If she had "gotten it", she would have been jaw-dropping-speechless on the other end of the line. I couldn't do it justice and I soooo wanted her to "see" this. I wanted it to be real for her too.

As I posted these pics for family and friends to "get it", these 2D imagines, even  with my descriptive words, could not come close to the real life experience, personally experiencing it for themselves. I did all I could to share it, but until they come for a visit and stand in the sands with me, they won't be able to fully experience it...personally. It has to be their personal experience to be real for them.

This is true in our relationship with God too. We cannot simply read about Him, hear other's descriptions of Him and fully "get it." We cannot experience God through others but we can imagine God because of others. 

We can imagine in our head what peace must feel like in the midst of chaos, what unconditional love must be like despite the world's conditions, what unspeakable joy must feel like in the midst of despair and heartache. You must experience God Himself, for yourself to know Him and "get it." Get it? 

May you, too, personally experience the amazing Creator of all Creation! He is glorious and the joy of my soul. He is the peace in my storms and the strength in my weakness. He is my Rescue and Redeemer. He is my greatest Love!!!! I pray that through my personal testimony and sharing of Who He is to me, that you too, will come to fully know and experience Him for yourself and "get it"! 

Our God is an awesome God!!! 

What does my soul really magnify?

"My Soul, My Soul, Magnifies the Lord..." but does it really? 

Our church worshiped with this song last week and as I was singing it, about half way through, I felt the prompting question, "Michele, does it?" I stopped singing and listened. (Click HERE to access this song on YouTube if you want to listen also." "Let every heart prepare His throne... Come and worship, do not be afraid. My soul, my soul magnifies the Lord. He has done great things for me....Wonderful. Counselor. Everlasting Father."  

Yes, awesome and Holy God. Wonderful. Counselor. Everlasting Father. It's easy to say these things, especially if you believe them. But then, does my soul magnify Him? Yikes, we can think all we want in our heads but what do I magnify... Self? Hatred? Bitterness? Selfishness? Greed? A Gossiper? Unforgiving? Judgement? Or do I magnify the Lord I say I worship with Patience? Love? Servant? Fair? Gentle? Trustworthy? Joy? Hope? Peace? Faith? Self-control? Kindness? If someone had a magnifying glass on me, what would be the most obvious? Honestly, it's a frightening thought, am I truly magnifying the Lord? Do others see His Light that I say (claim) I trust? Do I still have my own eyes set on Him?

Romans 3:23 says "for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." You may not even need a magnifying glass to see all my sin. We all have things going on in our heart, mind and soul that we hope no one knows. Sometimes our sins gets it's own t-shirt if you know what I mean! Often though, it takes a magnifying glass to find those little sins down in the hidden areas of our soul.

This week marked for me the 4 year anniversary of my Season of Hell. That's exactly what it felt like. As absolutely horrible it was, the redemption and healing that came of it, I would not trade having to have gone through that in order to be where I am today, healed and restored, freed from bondage, and passionately in Love with the Lord! I don't want my "old" Christian self back. God in His grace, provided so many instruments of healing through Christian counselors and mentors, strengthening old friendships to beautiful new ones, to timely bible studies, opportunities to encourage and be encouraged, etc, etc. 
I can honestly say that over these past 4 years, as I have pride-shattering, humbly put up a magnifying glass over my own heart, mind and soul and compared it to His, the more intentional I am to fix my eyes on Christ's Love to see more of Him and less of me. It's been a battle learning how to receive His unconditional Love into my sinful self. Seeking to be more intentional in His Name, it's my heart's desire to honor Him with my life, loving Him with all my heart, all my mind and all my strength, helping me to become more pure in my thoughts and deeds, "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer." Psalm 19:14  "Whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the Name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him." Colossians 3:17 I can see and even feel less of me and more of Him. Oh yes, there is still sin and there will be until we sit at the feet of Glory's throne. But that void of "something missing" has been filled with wonder and delight, only God can be all that!!! 

The Lord HAS done GREAT things for me! The song for me now is a prayer more than a declaration. It's a "fearful" thought to say I do magnify Him. Oh how I pray I do, but I cannot promise that I will. I am a sinner saved by grace who's greatest desire is to know Him more and share Him more! I pray that I lead a life reflective, magnifying the One who holds my very breath, my life, my heart. I am not perfect and don't claim to be (anymore-lol). But what I do claim is the Blood of Jesus poured out over me, cleansing me, redeeming me, guarding me, helping me, sanctifying me. PRAISE GOD!!!! 
It is my prayer that as Believers, we will encourage and love one another, stirring up in one another a purposeful intention and accountability to fix our eyes on the Lord and magnify His Love to the nations, both saved and wondering. Will they see Christ the Redeeming Savior? Who will they say we are celebrating? Will it be our life or His? We can fake our words but we cannot fake our heart's outpouring. Isn't it time to stop lying to ourselves and with pride-shattering faith, magnify the heart of God?!?


Father God, Christ Jesus, You are the Great I Am. My soul, my soul, how it is desperate for Yours. I am yours. Father, magnify Yourself to us so we may reflect You more and not only experience it but also share the unshakable Joy of Your salvation and Peace that surpasses all our understanding. In Your unending love and mercy, cleanse us and help us be who You created us to be. Take every part of us and cast out all that hinders us from being filled with You. Help us to be intentional in seeking You, knowing You, trusting You. God our Creation, Sustainer and Rock, we worship You, Wonderful Counselor, Everlasting Father. To You be all the glory forever and always, in every thing, every where. amen.