Let's Talk About Love

What does Valentine's Day mean for you? Remember those younger days when your Mom took you to the store to pick out the Box of Valentine's for every kid in your class whether you liked them or not?!? There was no avoiding not sharing kindness to the kids who were mean to you even in the slightest way. There is such a lesson to be learned right there and I could run down a rabbit hole with that one, but I will leave it there for right now. 

Statistics say Christmas and Valentines are the highest recordings of suicide and depression. People feel unloved or lonely. People feel left out in the absence of being romantically noticed. Oddly enough, relationship status has little to do with feeling loved, treasured, adored and precious. Couples - married, engaged or courting, may not have a partner who is good at showing love. Love is simply cultivated between any two people who genuinely care for one another.

Somewhere along the timeline of adolescence into adulthood, This Love Day evolved from a community love to a more sensual-focused couple-relationship in the receiving of affections physically through tangible gifts or human touch. 

Our human hearts are wired to desire Love, being the Love of Christ and Love with others. It becomes very easy as our hormones grow in adolescence to measure one's value on the quantity of received attention from other human hearts. The commercial retail industry's banks on the addiction to love as they flood the market with all things in the name of Love. So much so, the Love of Christ may not come to mind for most, yet here in His Sweet Love, we find the measure of our worth and value. In this season, may I remind you of the greatest commandment, Love God and Love others! Should we celebrate loving others? YES! Should we also celebrate the Love of God? YES! 

As an adult, married 29 years to my guy, Valentine's is not a sexual thing. I admit being a Super Romantic thanks to growing up with Cinderella and all the Disney Princesses. So for me, Valentine's is a day celebrating Love of all those who love you and all the ones you love. It is about all the Love in your life, not all the making love in your life. Does that mean a sensual Love in marriages across the world will not be made on this day? No, but it is not the primary call of the day.

Love is not selfish or self-seeking and God was the perfect example, giving us His Only Son because He loved us so much. So what ought we show in loving-kindness towards others? What may our focus be on this Day about Love? Sex or Serving? Lust or Love? Married people or all people? 
The saying is true, It better to give than receive and the Giver is more blessed than the Gifted. Our spirit stirs and our souls ignite with passion when we serve as a blessing and give from our heart, so we ought to do it, often...more than one day out of the year, right?! 

So, whether you are young person, married, divorced, separated, in a happy place or rocky place in your relationship, these are some ideas how you might celebrate Love as a family OR an individual and a few ideas at the end for the Ms and Mrs of the crowd.

Showing Love to another doesn't have to be expensive. It doesn't have to be roses, flowers and diamonds. It doesn't have to be from anyone....Love is something you GIVE, not get. So, let's share some Love....

Let's think of all the Whos. WHO can we show love to?

ANYONE and EVERYONE needs to be LOVED!!! Besides the once we easily think of like family members, children, teachers and dating partners, here are some others to consider: postman, FEDEX/UPS delivery drivers, local hospital staff, nurses, Pastors and their families, your local fire and police departments, cashiers, doctor's offices, law offices, DMV, garbage truck men, local businesses you frequent, women's or children's shelters, nursing home residents and staff, bankers, children's homes, tax office, military recruit centers, homeless, non-profits in your area, cleaning staff in the stores/malls/restaurants, drive thru windows at the pharmacy/fast food/bank/toll booth, wait staff and busboys...

WHAT can we do?
ANYTHING and EVERYTHING! Let's say money was no object, okay, well have fun and spoil and bless away with all your gifts and treats, but let's say you only have some money. Here are some ideas to do as a family or individual. 

• Make meals, crafts or cookies with a sweet note or bought card (Dollar Tree Valentine's are vintage treats!)
• Buy flowers, $10 gift cards, donate to a local charity
• Host a lunch or coffee date
• Pay for the groceries, coffee, happy meal, family meal without recognition
• Send Valentine's Cards to...who does God put on your heart? Look up their address online if it's been too many years to remember.
• Buy clothes or school supplies or event tickets for a family or friend you know would appreciate it. 
• Take a roadtrip to see friends/family/new city, buy an experience, take a (free) community sponsored class 

And if you don't have any money to spend, which was where I was a few years ago, here are some ideas, much of what I have done too.

• Clean someone's room/house/church/nearby park
• Pick up trash at your favorite park
• Put gas in the other person's car and say nothing, or take over a chore
• Attend a local (free) concert or event in your city or nearby with friends/family/group
• Invite a widow, single Mom, military Wife, College Kid another family over for dinner and games 
• Make spaghetti and make garlic bread sticks from hot dog buns and buy one bag of chocolates the day of for 50-75% off at most every store
• Pick flowers from your yard or from the side of the road and place in a tin can/mason jar/spaghetti jar/coffee cup and gift (check for bugs first! I learn that the hard way!)

For the rest of the List, CLICK HERE! 

And now what about YOU? You want to celebrate being Loved by such a wonderful Heavenly Father and delight yourself in it. The chocolate choices are abundant, and often 50-75% off the day of!! We give so much and we'd love a little something tangible to celebrate Love and express being loved too. So what can we do for ourselves, regardless of marital status?

• If you have money to spend, enjoy a night out with a friend or order take out and take it home alone (as a married woman, I treasure my nights in my pj's, with my favorite food and movie!)
• Buy yourself something within your own budget...it may be a $500 pair of earrings or a spa day or many it's a $5.00 Hershey's chocolate kiss or Recesses Peanut Butter Heart with your salad. 
• Wash the sheets and blankets. Add a drop of essential oil to the dryer ball.
• Take an extra long bath with your favorite book and a candle in the corner.
• Consider replacing an undergarment with something cute vs practical. 

For the rest of the list, click here!! 

No one is perfect. No marriage is perfect. No family is perfect. Only GOD is perfect and in His sweet, gracious, fun Love, we get to Live in it! His Love is unconditional. You cannot earn it or afford it. It is a Gift that cost Him greatly but He counted that cost and said You were worth it. YOU ARE LOVED!

This Valentine's Day, may you realize how greatly YOU are LOVED and know you are not alone. He is near, He sees and He knows what you need. Open your eyes and your heart to see this amazing grace and receive His Love, that you may also GIVE it!! 

"and may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all, as we do for you, 

so that he may establish your hearts blameless in holiness before our God and Father, at the coming of our Lord Jesus with all his saints." 1 Thess 3:12-13

"And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul," Deut 10:12

For those who enjoy researching, check out what is said to be the origin of Valentines. Very interesting! Click Here.

Do you "get it?!" I sooooo want you to!!

"Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, 7 rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving. 8 See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. 9 For in him the whole fullness of deity dwells bodily, 10 and you have been filled in him, who is the head of all rule and authority. 11 In him also you were circumcised with a circumcision made without hands, by putting off the body of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ, 12 having been buried with him in baptism, in which you were also raised with him through faith in the powerful working of God, who raised him from the dead. 13And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, 14 by canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands. This he set aside, nailing it to the cross. 15 He disarmed the rulers and authorities and put them to open shame, by triumphing over them in him." 

Colossians 2: 6-15

This morning, I grabbed my camera as I headed out the door to take the kids to school thinking I might stop by a nearby beach and "play" with my camera. What a beautiful place to play!! How can I share with you the beauty of that moment? I was intentional with my angle's trying to get the best shot, showing the most of the scenery, the everchanging view of the skies. A storm seemed to be brewing in the short amount of time I was out there on the pier. Within 15 minutes a double arc rainbow appeared, a cool breeze began to blow, and the textures and colors shifted intensely around me, in every direction, enhancing the gorgeousness of the moment. It was breathtaking and awes-inspiring.

My sweet friend called me when I was in the middle of taking in these moments and though I described all the colors, sounds and movement of the world around me...in that moment I have no doubt she could not have understood exactly what I was experiencing. It wasn't real for her. If she had "gotten it", she would have been jaw-dropping-speechless on the other end of the line. I couldn't do it justice and I soooo wanted her to "see" this. I wanted it to be real for her too.

As I posted these pics for family and friends to "get it", these 2D imagines, even  with my descriptive words, could not come close to the real life experience, personally experiencing it for themselves. I did all I could to share it, but until they come for a visit and stand in the sands with me, they won't be able to fully experience it...personally. It has to be their personal experience to be real for them.

This is true in our relationship with God too. We cannot simply read about Him, hear other's descriptions of Him and fully "get it." We cannot experience God through others but we can imagine God because of others. 

We can imagine in our head what peace must feel like in the midst of chaos, what unconditional love must be like despite the world's conditions, what unspeakable joy must feel like in the midst of despair and heartache. You must experience God Himself, for yourself to know Him and "get it." Get it? 

May you, too, personally experience the amazing Creator of all Creation! He is glorious and the joy of my soul. He is the peace in my storms and the strength in my weakness. He is my Rescue and Redeemer. He is my greatest Love!!!! I pray that through my personal testimony and sharing of Who He is to me, that you too, will come to fully know and experience Him for yourself and "get it"! 

Our God is an awesome God!!! 

Thicker Skin

I LOVE being out in the nature of God!! His glory is on display at every glance. There are glimpses of His mightiness in the trees and unshakeable boldness in the mountains, His consistency and strength in the waves of the oceans, His kindness and care in the smallest of detail on the flowers and creeping little critters.

 

There is so much beauty to be seen!!! I have hundreds of pictures from my time outside. One thing I have observed is the amount of thorns scattered amongst the beauty.
I was enjoying a day outside and as you can see in the photo with my sock, there are pokey things digging in like needles into my skin. I got these painful pokes during a walk with a friend. I couldn't take it anymore and I had to stop and remove these needles in my foot!! My friend laughed at my "tenderness" as she felt nothing from the few in her own sock. "How can that not hurt you?" I asked. She replied, " I guess I have thicker skin." I must agree...on many levels! LOL
God brought back that moment a few days later when I was upset. We look at other people and wonder how they can experience pains and seem unaffected by it while our heart feels like it is literally breaking into pieces. We will not all respond the same way to every situation. God did not create humans to be robots. We were created and fashioned differently. The truth is, what's true for me may not be true for you. We are His masterpiece, wonderfully made to think, feel, and live!

"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." Psalm 139:14

The way we think and respond (while rooted in the truth of Christ) to trials will vary. A harsh word spoken to me may be like a dart thrown at my heart while a harsh word spoken to my friend may be like throwing a spear at her heart. I may fall down but you can be sure my thick skinned friend would rise up before you, surely standing taller than you!! An illness or trial that falls upon me may cause my heart to fear while the same trial for another may gird them up in anticipation for a good, Holy fight. I may crater, while they rise up. We are not all the same.
It's easy for us to go about our day thinking our reality is the reality for everyone else, but I would dare to say there is a pridefulness within us that says "Our ways are right." "This is truth for me and therefore it must be the same for you." We begin to judge and possibly shame or condemn others when they don't respond just like we would in their situation. What makes us think we are so right?!
I am challenged today to check my pride and exercise mercy and compassion towards others knowing that what works for me and what I think is right may not be their right. (Obviously I am not discussing the absolutes of God's Words and commands. But considering the heart and soul of others.)
May we look at the Creation of our World and remember that we too are each created with a specific design. May we remember that God's Truth is the Only Truth to consider as absolute. Our roots and our fruits may be the same but the type of bloom we are is as diverse as the flowers of the fields!!

Challenge:
* Next time you hurt, know it's okay if it's hurting you. You may just have tender skin compared to another. And really, who's comparing? Our truth is Christ alone.

 "I will meditate on Your precepts and fix my eyes on Your ways." Psalm 119:15 

* And if another expresses hurt, extend mercy and love, believing their hurt to be real even if you don't think it's valid. 

"Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into Him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love." Ephesians 4:15-16

"Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; 5 and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; 6 and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. 7 To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.

For just as the body is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are one body, so it is with Christ. 13 For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body--Jews or Greeks, slaves or free--and all were made to drink of one Spirit. 

14 For the body does not consist of one member but of many. 

The eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you," nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you." 22 On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, 23 and on those parts of the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor, and our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, 24 which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, 25 that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. 26 If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together. 27 Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it." 1 Corinthians 12:4-7, 12-14, 21-27

Sitting at His Table Tonight

Ever felt the embarrassment of "less than?" I felt inadequate as I looked around. Their tables looked straight out of a magazine, or the top Pinterest board! They were beautiful and full, each one different in theme and style but all incredibly rich and lovely. I walked over to what was about to be my table and felt defeated as if I had merely brought 3 bags of mulch to dump on the table top and call it done. Deep sighs filled my heart and honestly, my spirit. There sat my uninvited guest, the enemy of insecurity.
How quickly "comparison" can rob us of our own personal joy. Just an hour before, I was hot glueing and glittering my candles to set just under my Grandmother's Bible in it's position that would be just above mine. I had devoted much time and energy planning out my table theme asking God to show me how He wanted me to interpret it into a beautiful setting for 8 ladies. God moved my heart to reflect on the theme and the meaning of this event..."Reflections of Light, Mentoring, Sisters, Encouraging, Older and Younger. The core is The Word shared. I grabbed my Grandmother's Bible and Mine as my centerpiece. Then "light", candles. Light of the Word, scriptures ON the candles. Reflections, mirrors and gemstones to catch all the many facets of light. And an angel standing nearby holding her heart to share. This table held possibly two of the most precious and valuable possessions I own...my Grandmother's Bible and my own. That was my table. Created by simplicity, lots of hot glue, staged with great meaning! But, was it good enough? At the time, I felt not. 
Here's the crossroad we face when we stare the enemy of inadequacy square in the face. Will we allow the enemy to charge us with fear and insecurity, or will our hearts rest confidently in the vision the Lord has seeded within? I wanted to drive straight to Kirkland's and buy an entirely new table setting (which I really couldn't have afforded.) I felt like the little black duckling in a sea of beautiful swans, I dropped off my bags and left to return after dinner.
Time came for me to pick up my oldest teen from baseball and upon entering the car he asked about my day and I told him it was okay, that I had just dropped off all my things at the church for my table. Sensing something wrong in my demeanor, he asked "Well, what's wrong with it?" I replied, " I just don't think it measures up with the rest of the women's rich tables." He came back with a quick remark, "If I was doing a table, I'd throw a camo net over the top, set out paper plates and paper cups, and call her done." And I bet he would too! It was good to laugh for a moment in my pitiful moment. Then, the very words that I have spoken into his heart for nearly 16 years were returned to me, "Mom, you just have to be you." And there in that profound moment, it cut to my core. He's right. In that moment, God used him to speak into my heart, straight past my convicted heart. What was I thinking?!? 
When we compare ourselves, our things, maybe even our giftedness and talents to others, we are actually rejecting God's created design, in essence saying, "You made a mistake. Can't you do better than that?"  What a frightening place to be when we reject the Hand and Heart of the One True God, The Creator of the Universe and everything good. There I stood, comparing...rejecting what the Lord had given to me to reflect His love for these women, and my worship of reflecting Him being overtaken by worry. 
The Lord our God has built each one of us with a unique DNA which sets us apart from everyone else in our physical attributes, emotional make up to our spiritual gifting and talents. When we reject ourselves, we are rejecting Christ's redeeming and unique work. Rejecting God's design brings destruction and rejection; however, when we walk and live by faith, trusting completely and waiting patiently for His perfect plan, we receive His blessings of peace, contentment, joy. Timely as always, this week in my Genesis bible study, the lesson opens with Abram and Sarai trying to "make it happen."  

"Now Sarai, Abram's wife, had borne him no children. She had a female Egyptian servant whose name was Hagar. And Sarai said to Abram, "Behold now, the LORD has prevented me from bearing children. Go in to my servant; it may be that I shall obtain children by her." And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai. So, after Abram had lived ten years in the land of Canaan, Sarai, Abram's wife, took Hagar the Egyptian, her servant, and gave her to Abram her husband as a wife. And he went in to Hagar, and she conceived. And when she saw that she had conceived, she looked with contempt on her mistress." Genesis 16:1-4

What a mess. It didn't look like God knew what He was doing, so Sarai did in her sight what made sense to her. She had a plan, despite that fact the God had already explained the plan to both her and her husband. She did it her way. She's not the only one to question God. We met Eve, in the beginning. Questioning God only brings trouble. 
Next time you have thoughts like, " Is this good enough?" "Am I good enough?" "What will he/she think?" "What if...(blah-blah-blah)...."....remember that the Lord your God created you and you are GOOD!!! Read Genesis 1-2 and you will see He is a specific God. This is not to say that you don't care about the watching world, rather, you Love God first, then others. If we would simply consume ourselves with what GOD thinks, remember that He created us with specific attributes that He felt were necessary for our good and His glory, who are we to question what He has made? There can't be comparisons for what are we comparing to?! It's apples to oranges. 
Great satisfaction comes when we find ourselves established and rooted in the Lord our Creator and King. Satan stands ready for any opportunity to present doubt before you and if our thoughts are consumed on Christ alone, we can stand against the schemes of the devil!!! 
I am looking forward to tonight, knowing that every piece on the table brings a smile to my Father's heart, and knowing that I am sitting at His table and not mine.

Father God, tonight I honor the Reflections of Your Light, The Light of Your Word. Thank You for creating me uniquely and help me to embrace what You see as good. When I feel inadequate Lord, I know my eyes are looking to the left and right, Holy Spirit, keep my eyes focused on You that I may not see the temptations of doubt standing beside me, waiting to steal my focus and my joy. Give me courage to walk in my giftedness, as quirky, dorky and crafty as they may be compared to the riches of the world, God, to You be all the glory in all that You see as good. May it be so in my life. Thank you for caring enough about me to speak truth to me through other godly women and even through the mouths of my children. Your Word truly is the Light unto my Path! Thank you Lord for Your faithfulness. I love You with all that I have and I praise You with all my heart. To YOU be ALL the glory as You reign over the heavens and the earth, and everything in it, including me. You are Lord, amen.

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." Genesis 1:27

"You shall be careful therefore to do as the LORD your God has commanded you. You shall not turn aside to the right hand or to the left." Deuteronomy 5:32

"Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil." Ephesians 6:11