Encouragement When You Feel Depressed and Alone : Let's Pray

"When I said, "My foot is slipping," Your love, O LORD, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, Your consolation brought joy to my soul." Psalm 94:18-19 

Not every day can be a great day. Over the years I have learned to be more truthful with my feelings and stop hiding behind the "I'm fine" response which most often translates I am not okay. Saying I wasn't okay seemed to admit defeat or reveal a lack of faith. I convinced myself somewhere along the path of perceived togetherness, it wasn't okay to not be okay. 

My mind would say if I prayed harder, there'd be more Happy. If I listened to worship music and read my Bible a little longer, my circumstances might change which would surely change my heart and mind too. I would never had admitted a bad day for fear of being judged that I was a hypocrite or a weak Christian. How sneaky and manipulative is our enemy.

It took getting stuck in lots of pits and circling the same walls over and over to finally get through them. I've learned to honestly answer, "Not every day can be a great day, and I am not okay, but God is faithful." It is bearing false witness if you say everything's great when it's not. The false joy and perceived peace are not healing hopes. They are deceiving masks. 

The Lord tells us in His Word there will be trials and storms. What a prideful thing to equate ourself to God in thinking we can control things. You and I may be able to fake out some people, but we cannot fake out God or those closest to us who can immediately see the shattered twinkle in our eye. I think the Lord gives our close companions a special kind of discernment to know when we are not okay and call our bluff. Those are special kinds of Sisters.

Of course there is the opposite of me out there when someone is a Pity Party for One and all are invited in. They can't fathom anything good cuz the world is evil and there's no good left in anything or anyone. How exhausting it must be to live like that. 

People with drama drain me. I will certainly pray for them, but I am not going to enable them and I don't have to spend more than a minute with them either. Hello Healthy Boundaries. 

Life is just too short to waste time complaining, contemplating and gossiping. My Mom has always said I wear Rose-Colored glasses but I come by it honestly. I know the Lord gifted Hospitality, Encouragement, Empathy and Compassion into my heart but my Grandma used to always tell me, "Always find something kind to say to every person you encounter." So, here I am born with a glasses of Hope and yet, I still struggled with insecurity and anxiety.

Life isn't going to always be great no matter how we try to create a perfect place. There are seasons our sorrow will outweigh our happy. And God didn't promise us happy. He promised us a Helper. Life gets really hard and sometimes our prayers feel they fall onto deaf ears. We gasp for a breath under the weight of expectations, hopes and dreams that only seem to fade. 

So many friends are dealing with huge issues and it's hard even when it's not you. I read comments in social media groups that break my heart and drive me to want to be a louder, bolder Encourager and Light for the Lord, to reach those in dark places at the edge of depletion. I have been on that edge and praise God, 

He sent His Helper and His hugs through amazing, honest, warrior woman who knew how to Hug my heart through prayer and accountability. Scripture says together we are a City on a Hill if we all chose to Shine which means, no masks. Does that mean we tell everyone everything? Do we post on social media all our failures, problems, conflicts, insecurities? No. We are wise to pray before we post and ask, seek, knock where our help will come from. 

Our God....He is a Mighty Force, Ruler over all Authorities and principalities. Our Lord is a greater force than our finite minds can imagine. He is a real God, a loving Father, Great Counselor and Friend. He is our Rock and Refuge. He is our Anchor Who holds us in place when we find ourselves being tossed to and fro. When the seas roar, He has the power to calm them. (It's the only time you should stay close to a power source in a storm!! heehee!!!) 

When we know Who God is, there we find our Hope. Hope strengthens our faith and faith drives our perseverance, which strengthens our joy. No one can do what He can do but He can use us as His hands and feet here on this side of Heaven to bring that Hope Reminder to others. To remind the broken hearted He is near and He knows where we are. 

And the most important fact I learned: He is trustworthy and faithful. His love is unconditional and He loves me right where I am, in my insecurity, my anger, my fear, my hurt, my unknowns...He loves me here. Are we willing to surrender ourselves to Him? Do you trust Him to be a Promise Keeper? Do you believe He is Who He says He is?

One day, crashing waves will find their calm and joy will conquer painful sorrow as all the tears are absorbed into The Master's sackcloth. There is a time for everything as Ecclesiastes 3 explains. We will dance but we will also mourn. All in His time.

I challenge you to do more than simply give an Honest Answer. Surrender and Trust Him. Depend on Him. When you trust Him, you will be honest with Him so you can then be honest with yourself, and others because you trust Him more than you trust yourself. We can find comfort knowing God is Who He says He is and gives us exactly what we need as we need it. You cannot borrow joy, or grace. You cannot create peace. You cannot move mountains, divide oceans, calm storms, or create life from ashes. But God is more than able to do exceedingly more than we can ever imagine. 

Do you trust Him as YOUR Honest Answer?! 

Lord, as we cry our salty tears, replenish us with Your Living Waters. Give us the peace only You can. Heal our hurts. Forgive our unbelief. Forgive our forgetfulness of who You are. Forgive us for minimizing Your power of provision and grace in our lives. You are more than we can imagine and Your love immeasurable. Give us favor in the mustard seed of our faith to walk trusting You. Transform our insecurities with Your insight.

We believe at the command of Your voice, healing can come and hearts restored. Lord, heal our broken bodies. Renew our minds and set them on You again. Help our broken hearts beat in the rhythm of Your grace. 

God,  I pray for those in the middle of a storm, remind them of the Strength of Your Anchor! Send hugs and Help to them and lift them up. Call out to the winds and calm them that You may be seen walking on the horizon. Break their chains and renew their hope in Jesus Name. Grant them peace, revive their strength. Relieve the weight of their sorrows and replace it with Your mercy, new every morning! 

We acknowledge You are faithful, steadfast and Honest. Father, we worship You and bow before You asking for revelation of Your Power. Use us and gather us as a City on The Hill. Open our eyes to see what You see and clear our minds to hear wisdom. Give us courage to take off our masks and be a Light for You. Take our flesh and cleanse us. You are so patient and worthy. We praise Your Holy Amazing Name! You are everything to us. Amen!!

"You turned my wailing into dancing; You removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing to You and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give You thanks forever." 

Psalm 30:11-12

Don't Fight Your Battles with Toothpicks

For every trial or crisis I have faced in my own life, I am continually amazed at the graciousness of God. How grateful I am for the Holy Spirit who dwells in me, who intercedes on my behalf when I am like a deer caught in the headlights and find myself frozen, unprepared for what I am facing. 

When one of my greatest crisis hit, I wasn't prepared and I froze. I stood aimlessly and was crushed, not knowing what to do or where to go. How I regret not having the muscle memory of faith, trust, wisdom, knowledge and steadfastness. Had I been more deeply rooted, and if I had known what I know now of God's power, I would have stood with greater confidence in my battle and fought harder, stood taller, endured longer and truly believed He was working out something better, for my good and His glory. But, I didn't. I wasn't prepared.

Thankfully the Lord is gracious and patient. I needed to grow in strength and courage, and had already prepared for me His hands and feet, His hugs and hope. God called out a few of His strong women to come alongside me, and teach me as they interceded for me and led me the Way back towards Him. They had spiritual muscle memory and experience not only in life, but with the Lord that I didn't have but I had always wished for. 

I wanted to be strong and courageous. I wanted to be a warrior woman who never failed or cratered under the weight of the world. I wanted to sing praises even if my heart and mind were shattered. I wanted my heart to bleed for the things of God even if it was scared or broken. But, I hadn't prepared or disciplined myself for it. My Wish List never turned into my To Do List. 

I am so thankful He uses ordinary people in His Word and in my reality to do battle for His Kingdom work. Don't believe the lie that you are the only one fighting battles. Don't think everyone but you is stronger or that no one else faces temptations. We all fall short and no one is perfect. There are seasons for everything and we must be willing servants to be what He needs. Some days we will need to be picked up off the floor and held up and other times, we may be that person who does the heavy lifting. 

But when we find ourselves a little lazy, the enemy pounces on the opportunity to mess with us. Who runs a marathon without training? Who loses 20 lbs without first losing the first 5lbs? We have access to swords but so often we fight with toothpicks. No wonder we feel less than or inadequate.

God orchestrates life in the timeline only He can see. 

He is intentional in placing circumstances and people exactly where they accomplish goals set before us that we can't imagine because it is The Lord who has the Master Plan that leads us back to Him if we are willing to listen and obey. The Lord doesn't pass out toothpicks or use an Escape room to watch us crater under the power of darkness and chaos. As Children of Light ,we have access to The Power that conquers death, moves mountains and breaks the heaviest of chains.

The Lord is faithful. 

When I don't know what's happening, I can trust The One Who does. He leads me when I am lost towards paths of righteousness, beside the still waters. He comforts me and reminds me I am not alone when I am surrounded by the darkness of my pit. He reminds me that I can do all things with Him because He is my strength when I have collapsed. He reminds me there is a plan and that He is greater than any opposition I will ever face as I stare into the face of the enemy. 

I am so thankful for His compassion and grace. He stands by me and equips me for the battles I know are coming and He carries me through the ones I don't. He graciously gives me glimpses into the seeds He is planting. 

When life floods my soul, He is my rescue. When I don't know what the answer is, He reminds me He IS The Answer. He is a faithful God. Oh how I want to return the blessing of being faithful back. For all the things I wish I could be, I am reminded today that I already am all these things, I just need to believe it.

Whatever you are facing today, rest in His love trusting you are not alone. Stand in His strength and face your trials and temptations without fear. Continually prepare yourself by being in His Word, surrounding yourself with other God loving people and taking care of your body physically so it can better support you emotionally and spiritually. 

Know, and accept you are deeply loved, seen and heard. Build those muscles of endurance physically, emotionally and spiritually so you can pick up your sword at battle and leave the toothpicks in the kitchen cabinet where they belong.
Be ready! 

"And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle,encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone. 

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 

Do not quench the Spirit. Do not despise prophecies, but test everything; hold fast what is good. 

Abstain from every form of evil. 

Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. 

He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it."
1 Thess 5:14-24

Letting Go of our Words

It's gonna be okay Baby.

Mommy is right here.

Here, let me help you with that.

I can show you, come here.

Need a hug? Come here...

Want Mommy to kiss it and make it better?

You need to pick up all your toys before you get the game out.

Walk right over here and your shoes won't get dirty.

Try this...

You need to eat these veggies so you can have your pudding.

Play outside for 20 minutes and then you can watch a show.

Mommy asked you to stop doing that please.

   

Oh the control we once had as the Mommy. The responsibility of a parent to be in control, and self-controlled when you felt as if you were going to lose all control in the next breath can be overwhelming. As a Mom, I loved every phase I entered, from newborn sweetness, infant giggles, to toddler voices and flower picking to the exploratory phases of elementary ages. (For me, this was the most physically fatiguing.) The independent learning and ability for deeper comprehensions of older elementary into middle school with managing friendships and extracurriculars where home became a safe base to slide home to and yet a place quickly left for a social. Hormones get a little tricky during these years and it's a different kind of Mommy fatigue than the Terrible 3's. Talk about being emotionally drained. There's so much more to manage and process. 

Enter high school, where all the encouraging and instructing things you used to say become distant cliche's because they somehow know it all. Friends, homework, jobs, girlfriends, don't forget extracurriculars dictate the schedule. Your family learns how to orbit in the same universe, especially if you have more than one child. There are still cuddles and laughter and expectations amongst the power struggles and closed doors but the leave and cleave begins to pull your child away one little tug at a time, as it ought. It's funny how intuition and reading between the lines replaces the eyes in the back of our head. 
For 18 years, we intentionally train them up in righteousness, good habits, relational skills, etiquettes and all the practical living life stuff making many decisions for them to protect them from themselves explaining our logic and reasoning time and time again. Year by year, our mouths find the subtle clinching of fewer words with less command and more compassion in each syllable. I don't find myself literally saying less really, but in some ways yes. You don't have to explain or teach as much. They get old enough to understand deeper reasoning and it can be a simple head nod and they seem to understand exactly what you are saying. For all these years our words held a special power of authority over them. In older years, the authority gradually shifts to counsel. Exasperated, I remember thinking, "Will they ever get it?!?" Ha, I still have those thoughts. I will always be praying!! 

Through every season of age there is an element of letting go, as you allow them the freedom to make choices and learn to navigate the consequences of their choices, giving less command and more observational prompts. You watch them make choices you may or may not agree with and with that, experience the outcomes which hopefully reap a good harvest and not depleting ones. This is probably the hardest part in each phase, letting go and trusting they know what they know, knowing you have done all you know to do. There's always gonna be regrets as a parent but there's always going to be grace and gratitude.
My Mommy's heart wants to protect them in every age from all harm, evil, bad decisions, pains, which is impossible to do. Truthfully, we can attempt to wrap them in bubble wrap all the days of their lives, but by doing that, we block God. At some point, with God as their ultimate Shepherd, they need to make mistakes and adapt, learning lessons from their own mistakes and what they need to do different next time. I don't believe in the School of Hard Knocks leaving them to figure each age out on their own, but at the same time, we must learn when our words have been spoken enough and the heart stretched as wide as it can go for them and trust that the Lord is their net, and not ourselves.  They are His, we have only been entrusted with them for a time such as this. We raise them up to leave and the net that follows them all the days of their lives is The Lord. 
I imagine how our bodies adapt to the approaching birth of our child from the womb as the lining thins and the cervix opens, so it is with our hearts, slowly stretching out for our child to have their own breath and beat in life, separate from ours. One, yet two. And two, yet one in Christ we live our lives.
Praying for all the Mamas out there seeking the Lord for the energy, wisdom, care, strength, discernment, self-control, gentleness, patience, grace, love, faith to choose our words for edifying, encouraging, benefiting to the raising up of these precious ones the Lord has placed in our homes, one year at a time, until death do us part. To the Glory of God, towards the Hope of Salvation and Mercy of Life, redemptive Grace and undeniable Love. Give us tender hearts and strong souls to train them up in You that they may follow You all the days of their lives. Bless us, Bless them, Bless You. Waving the white flag of surrender, Amen. 

"You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." Deuteronomy 6:7 (ESV)

Pleasures and Purpose in my Identity

THIS! What freedom when we let chocolate do its own thang, coffee do its own thang and let God do His thang! Just as no one else can accomplish what you were created for, no one (or thing) else but God can do what only He can do. It's unfair to yourself and others to expect something in return that they can't give.
I don't think we realize sometimes we are doing it. We feel unloved, overwhelmed, empty, unimportant, boring, inadequate, forgotten, useless and we look for an out, an affirmation from somewhere out in the universe that assures us we are more than we feel. We look for ways to feel better about our life, or maybe find that escape to distract us from digging deep and dealing with what we are facing in our heart. I believe God intertwined into our souls, a seeking gene, so that we would crave something more than the sum of ourselves. We were created to seek Him and find our soul satisfaction in His love alone. Creation has a unique bond to it's Creator and there is no other oneness the same.
And yet we get caught up in the tangibles that give us quick answers and satisfaction. It's almost easier even though in the end, we make more work for ourselves to get out of denial and move into soul seeking, life changing affirmation of who in the world we actually are. Runaway Bride was one of my favorite movies during such a time as this in my own life. Sometimes you just get so caught up being everything to everyone else, you forget who you are. The Scriptures are also full of examples of people needing an identity evaluation. It starts when we are young, trying to fit in and sometimes we just never break the cycle of people-pleasing and avoiding the emptiness within us.
A quick fix in friendships, relationships, marriage, food, alcohol, medications, sexuality, jobs and even in serving others. If only I had....I would feel happier, stronger, important and accepted. Instead of enjoying these for what they are meant for, we turn these pleasures into plugs, hoping they will fill the voids and somehow make us feel whole, purposeful and necessary. True love casts out fear by truth in love. Just Jesus. Only God can affirm us, give us courage, hope, strength, joy, peace, deep soul satisfaction. When we find our identity and needs met in Christ, we find the truest of self. It's not who we are, but Who's we are. Once we can answer that question, depending on what the answer is, we will live in an anchored hope in a sure foundation or we will be found on sinking sand.
Friend, let go of the quest to find approval in others. Walk in confidence in the One who knows you, sees you and loves you unconditionally knowing Who's you are. He thinks you're pretty amazing. Who else knows you better? Who knows your thoughts before you speak them? Who knows your comings and goings, when you lie down and when you are awake? (Pslam 139) Who has the authority over all things and in Him is able to do anything? (Romans 8) When your Father is The King, that makes you co-heir to royalty and all the privileges that come with that are yours. (Romans 8:16-17) His riches are immeasurable. In Him, we are powerful, loved, whole, able and enough. We are complete in Him even when we don't feel we've got it all together. Most days we don't which is why we need Him every single day.
God loves you. God will not leave you or forsake you. He wants to give you the desires of your heart in the things that make you happy, but they all originate in Him and are gifted to you to be used for His glory, reflecting this amazing grace as witness to His beautiful love. Allow Him to gift you the gifts of this earth as extensions of Himself. Enjoy serving, relationships, foods, intimacy, travel, ministry, extra curriculars, working, responsibilities, your children. Just be careful that in them, you are not expecting validation, approval, or creating your identity in them. Our lives were meant for pleasure but they were also meant for purposes greater than our eyes can see. In the spiritual realm, we are constantly at war with the enemy and our flesh and sometimes that war can lead us into temptations outside God's will. Our enemy's hope is to distract us from the voice of our Father long enough to take us captive for a fleeting moment. Over time, we can find ourselves craving the desires of the flesh over the things of God. (John 10:10) 
Put on the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-17) daily and guard your hearts and minds as you seek The Lord and receive in Him who you are because you accept Him as your greatest heart's desire, purpose and provision. Seek first the Kingdom of God. (Matt 6:33) He is all you ever need. Receive His perfect love and freely enjoy the gift of salvation, walking in freedom now and for all eternity. (John 8:36) Receive the good things He has given you, for every perfect gift is from above (James 1:17)...especially Chocolate!

Pain You Can't See

Some days the pain is intense and frustrating.  Even though it may not stop me completely, it most certainly slows me down. Most days are good days like the many past yesterdays but there's days like today I wish I could sleep it off for a few hours and wake up refreshed and spunky, back at the tasks needing to be accomplished today.

Over a year ago I slipped on a wet spot at the local grocery store. They apparently had watered their fresh produce section as the hose was stretched out and the rugs below were marked half way with the water line, but there were no caution cones to draw my attention to the recent wet zone. Yes, I was totally embarrassed but the lasting wound wasn't my pride. It was my neck. It has been whiplashed, without the car, just the cart!

In the beginning there were more awful days than good days. I couldn't carry any weight, including my Study Bible or a purse. For a while, I could not work in the yard, do our laundry, and my favorite thing living here in Florida: paddle boarding and snorkeling. Even a simple ride on the boat had me on edge for the slightest bounce. Over time with therapy and oils, strength has slowly come back but every now and then, it locks up and swells. Pressure builds in my ears causing ringing and sensitivity to sudden or loud sounds and as if it cuts circulation, my eyes and face have a puffiness to it. Some days there are headaches with it but not always of which I am grateful. I name it my Penguin Day of limited mobility and hibernation at home where it is quiet and the ice pack and heating pads are constant rotations. Today is that day.

But life goes on despite the pain. I count it such a blessing to have an understanding hubby who steps up to the plate and helps me with the house and kids knowing I am temporarily out of commission and knows I will suck it up and do what I can in good moments and is even good about not allowing me to push too hard. Sitting helpless is not my forte'. My heart aches for those who have to deal with similar, and worse, ailments day in and day out, for years. Being out of commission impacts those around you in ways you can't imagine. It can be exhausting and frustrating for them as well.

As I rest here on the heating pad, I can't help but think of the other pains we carry sometimes for a season, or maybe even chronically as thorns in our flesh. Physical ailments aren't the only thing that can unravel and arrest our day. Emotional pains unravel us too. They hurt our bodies dare I say as equally as physical ones. Conflicts at home with a spouse or child, or in the work place, betrayals of family or friends, loss of loved ones, illnesses, and miscommunications, hurt our hearts, depressing our heart and body, figuratively and literally. When I am in physical pain, it depresses my mood and leaves me frustrated and in likeness, emotional pain hurts my body on the insides where it may not obvious to the seeing eye, such as palpitations, racing heart, headaches, high blood pressure, adrenal fatigue and developing ulcers. Stress of any form hurts us in every form of our being.

I wonder...if there was a frowning emoji that appeared on our foreheads when we were hurting deeply on the inside, physically or emotionally, how many of us would have one appear today? And would we want people to even know? Hmmm. I know some people enjoy a good pity party, so maybe some will. I am not one who is an attention seeker and is better at isolating to "deal," I would rather others not know unless I see need to share as maybe it keeps me from fulfilling a task promised. I hate attention. If I am hurting in any way, I would rather stay home alone.

Over the years, the Lord has helped me learn to share better with the trusted few He has blessed me with to pray my way through the painful moments in life. What a blessing they are to me. We all need praying friends for such a time as this. In the good times when life is full of laughter and on days the anguish consumes our body.

Despite the different pains I am feeling today, my heart is glad knowing that the God I love and serve with all of my heart, mind and soul, sees me, hears me and holds me. The longer I study His Word, I am shown that pain and suffering are just life. Our bodies were not made to live forever here in this dirt and soil, rather we were made for glory. No one knew suffering, betrayal or forgiveness and especially physical pain, like Christ Himself. 

Following Christ did not exempt followers from suffering and persecution. The Scriptures tell us these momentary sufferings produce a weight of eternal glory. Will we trust Him? Will we deny Him? Will our spirits glean hope from the cloud of witnesses who have gone before us in this life and endure this race? Will we forgive ourselves? Others? Will pain or praise be our battle cry? As Believers, strength comes from The Word and we are wise to dwell in it with ferver and consistency, putting on its armor and walking in its wisdom.

While we are left on this earth, as woman, can we also give thanks to the Lord for good hair products, cute clothes and awesome make up?!? For real. Thank You Lord! Unfortunately the eyes are windows to the soul and only a good pair of sunglasses can hide those. My closest friends can look me in the eyes and within 15 seconds know there is pain somewhere inside me. So if you see me wearing my sunglasses and it's not especially sunny, there's your first clue. I took this picture today to remind me of these thorny days that pain may threaten my praise but praise will always threaten my pain. God is greater.

Whatever pain you have inside you today, take comfort knowing God is compassionate and sees you where you are. There may remain a thorn or two in your flesh as do many of us, but God...His grace will be amazing if we give into resting in it and not fighting against it. The pain may not fully go away, and that’s a hard one to figure out but who are we to question the sovereign God who has established not only our path, but the course of all time and everything in it. Trust His timing and do not fear the trials you are facing within. Cry out to the Lord and surrender the questions and the pain to His care. He is more than able to carry you though the valley under the shadow of His wings, beside His still waters. No one else may know your pain, but God, He does.

“Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.
Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight. Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” Romans‬ ‭12:9-18‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Be still my soul, be still.

Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless His Holy Name.

He is good. Amen.

Overcoming The Blahs with Blessings

You just can't seem to shake it. That feeling of defeat. The weight in your body pulling you downward. Your legs and arms droop. You have the energy of a sloth. The sun seems too bright for your eyes, your heart feels deflated and your mindfulness escapes you. Blah. That's how you'd respond if someone asked you how you were feeling. I've heard it called Spring Fever, Depression, being in a Slump, having the Blues, etc and the degrees of it range the arc of a rainbow.

There's many factors that contribute to the "blahs" from hormones to life circumstances, immediate or on going. While I think there are obvious times of the year such as holidays and after New Year's we are most susceptible to feeling depressive, it can be a seasonal and random thing for any one of us. 

I am brought to prayer and writing today after seeing a few friends sharing their recent blues. The old saying "Takes one to know one" comes to mind as my heart skips a beat in shared sorrow but also in the desire to encourage. I have been here and have a tendency to be 'blah' too, so how do we break out of the blahs?!

It goes without saying but I will say it in case someone needs it to be said, if you have feelings of great despair, deplete and feel as if you have gotten to the place where death seems like your best option, you must, you must, you must reach out to your Pastor or other clergy in your church, or seek a professional counseling center in your area. This is a pit you will not navigate out alone, and you shouldn't have to. 

You are loved and there are people God has placed in your location and life, for such a time as this, to touch your heart and soul for Him and you are not alone. Reach out and reach up for that Hand. Do not waste another moment, go.

For those days and seasons we walk through the uncalendared season of Blah, what can we do to shake off the blah? Bottom line for me is Worship. Worship wipes out worry and ushers in joy. Worship is the vitamin our heart needs to be healthy. The enemy cannot steal the joy, peace or focus of a woman in deep worship.

What then is worship? According to Webster's Dictionary, worship means,
: to honor or reverence as a divine being or supernatural power 
: to regard with great or extravagant respect, honor, or devotion a celebrity worshipped by her fans
: to perform or take part in worship or an act of worship

Notice it doesn't say worship is something you do for 30 minutes each week at a local church. Worship is not the singing portion of a church service. Yes, we worship the Lord through song and prayer during a corporate gathering, but the act of worship is a lifestyle, a way of thinking and living. It's the intention of the moment or activity. To honor the Lord, to put in action that which is our heart's belief of adoration.

  "And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:17

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

Therefore let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe,  for our God is a consuming fire." Hebrews 12:1-2, 28-29 ESV

Each time we choose to worship over our worry of woes, our spirit refreshes and stirs the embers of Light in your soul. Worry and defeating thoughts pour water on our embers. Depending on how much you are watering your fire, depends on how quickly your Light will burn out. Even a steady drip of water can sizzle out a fire, one drop at a time if nothing else fans that flame. And when that gush pours over you due to a life crisis, how much more you can withstand if your fire was beyond the borders of it's reach. One drop of water can't put out the flares of the sun or diffuse a volcano, but it will put out the flame of a candle.

Now how? How do we worship when we feel blah? In every way: body mind, soul and spirit. 

Spiritually, first and foremost, you must be in The Word of God and not just self-help or fantasy books or blogs. It's easier to read a quick "feel good" about positive thinking but The Word of God is alive and active, diving truth (Hebrews 4:12) which is crucial to your identity, purpose and practicalness. You have an enemy who fears you staying fixed on Jesus and falling deeper in love with Him. 

The enemy seeks to destroy and divide in many ways and defeating thoughts and depression are a few of them. Let God tell you who He is, who you are in Him, the purpose He has for you and how together with Him you will accomplish these things. The spirit intercedes on our behalf when our groans are too great and words escape us. If all you can utter is one thing, say Jesus. There is incredible power in His name alone. Speak it out loud and remind the enemy Who you are seeking and worshiping. 

Emotionally and practically in your day, turn on Christian music whether it be your local radio or online station or Spotify app. During these days, you need the words to proclaim your heart and mind cannot pour out apart from the help of those God has gifted as song writers and worship leaders to draw your heart and mind into active worship through song. Words shape our prayers. 

Watch what you are putting into your body, like sugars, alcohol, drugs, unhealthy foods and energy drinks. I have to be mindful of my diet when I am blah. For a period of time, I had to cut all sugars and focused on cleaner eating and that's not easy when you have loss of appetite and want a warm chocolate chip cookie (or two) or a frozen ice cream as comfort food. Confession between us: I am a Dr Pepper or Southern Sweet Tea Girl paired with some salty hot fries when I need a little comfort food. I don't drink alcohol so these are my Go Tos.

Once you get past the first day or two, it gets easier I promise. Choose wisely and practically. Make some protein shakes that give you a meal's serving and great base for snacks and grab some good salad makings. Don't cheat yourself from good bacon and croutons! If we're gonna be good, let's make it a delicious good! Choose to worship with your bodily choices. Your body is a temple, keep it pure for His breath to fan the flames.

Exercise and/or activity are equally necessary. Believe me, the couch, my blankets and my puppy are the perfect cuddle for comfort. Slipping back under the covers for sleep while may be a temporary escape, and if you genuinely need a nap, take one, but do not sleep your days and nights away. You lose muscle tone and endorphins deplete. 

Whatever (healthy) hobby you enjoy, do it. Grab your paint brush, camera, pet, walking shoes, weights, make up, book, hammer, computer and muster up the energy to determine to "just do it." You will feel so much better, then your next outing ought to be with a friend. Go for a walk, meet for lunch, go sit at the shore. Definitely don't go to the bar or mall, where you can create more problems in your moment of deplete. 

Allow your mind to relax and your heart to receive. 

Laughter truly is contagious and healing. Be honest with your friend and be vulnerable. Share your blah with her and allow her to minister to you through prayer, help and hugs. Since moving to Florida, simply taking in a little salty air for a lunch break or a sunset bless my soul like nothing else these days. I am not a star-gazing girl, but the Lord has brought me outside at night over the past year to gaze at the stars he calls out every single night. It's an amazing thing to be reminded of His consistency. At the end of a tough day, I'll go stand in the middle of my yard and just look up. More than Twinkle Twinkle wishes, it's worshiping the Star Himself.

I cannot tell you how many times over the years pride shut me down but God....He is gracious and merciful to stir in a friend's heart to reach out. Knowing I should say Yes, I do and it is exactly the thing my soul needs. There's a few Sister Friends that just see right through me and know when I need a prayer or a laugh and boy can they bring it in Jesus name. Divine appointments are one God sends to us, for us to receive and return to Him His glory and love. They may be obvious, but maybe it's just a thing He does unseen. This is where faith is. This is where hope anchors us.

There comes a warning in here too, to make sure you don't become self-absorbed and settle into the attention that comes from pity parties. Turn your blah into someone elses blessing. How can you make someone else smile and feel loved today? Who can you serve in Jesus name?

David penned Psalms representing every feel there is known to man from fear to ferocious love. As you read The Word, be sure to include the reading of The Psalms and find passages that express how you feel and know you're not alone in them. But also find Psalms that express your praise and adoration, and hope. I love Psalm 18 and it's my go to (one day I will memorize it) for worshiping in Truth and promise. 

There's so many other things you can research online and find like journaling tips, breathing techniques, foods for boosting mindfulness, and you can do that but my heart encouragement for you is to simply Be still and seek the heart whisper of Jesus. Settle yourself enough to feel yourself inhale Grace. Exhale the blah. With each breath, worship and exhale the words out loud. In the fire, He is with you. In deep waters where your feet no longer reach, He lifts you. He is faithful and near, you can trust Him.

There is power in the beautiful name of Jesus. Exchange your blah for blessings abundant and watch your Light explode for our God is a consuming fire and darkness cannot drown it out! Oh Lord, we praise You Most High as conquerors in Your name. We believe nothing can separate us from Your amazing love as declared in Romans 8. 

Lift our eyes and strengthen our limbs to lean into your hold. Be our shield against the sinful thoughts of this broken world and release the chains that bind us and weight us down that we may be free to move where You lead us. Return to us the joy of our salvation and breath reviving breath back into the lungs of our souls. We are asking, seeking and trusting You, we worship You, Jesus. Praise Your name, in the Name of Jesus, amen and amen.

The Lord Is My Rock and My Fortress

To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David, the servant of the Lord, who addressed the words of this song to the Lord on the day when the Lord rescued him from the hand of all his enemies, and from the hand of Saul. He said:

I love you, O LORD, my strength. 
The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.  I call upon the LORD, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies. 

 The cords of death encompassed me; the torrents of destruction assailed me; the cords of Sheol entangled me; the snares of death confronted me. 

In my distress I called upon the LORD; to my God I cried for help. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry to him reached his ears. 

Then the earth reeled and rocked; the foundations also of the mountains trembled and quaked, because he was angry. Smoke went up from his nostrils, and devouring fire from his mouth; glowing coals flamed forth from him. 

He bowed the heavens and came down; thick darkness was under his feet. He rode on a cherub and flew; he came swiftly on the wings of the wind. 

He made darkness his covering, his canopy around him, thick clouds dark with water. Out of the brightness before him hailstones and coals of fire broke through his clouds. 

The LORD also thundered in the heavens, and the Most High uttered his voice, hailstones and coals of fire. And he sent out his arrows and scattered them; he flashed forth lightnings and routed them. Then the channels of the sea were seen, and the foundations of the world were laid bare at your rebuke, O LORD, at the blast of the breath of your nostrils. 

He sent from on high, he took me; he drew me out of many waters. 

He rescued me from my strong enemy and from those who hated me, for they were too mighty for me. 

They confronted me in the day of my calamity, but the LORD was my support. He brought me out into a broad place; he rescued me, because he delighted in me. 

The LORD dealt with me according to my righteousness; according to the cleanness of my hands he rewarded me. For I have kept the ways of the LORD, and have not wickedly departed from my God. 

For all his rules were before me, and his statutes I did not put away from me. I was blameless before him, and I kept myself from my guilt. 

So the LORD has rewarded me according to my righteousness, according to the cleanness of my hands in his sight. 

With the merciful you show yourself merciful; with the blameless man you show yourself blameless; with the purified you show yourself pure; and with the crooked you make yourself seem tortuous. For you save a humble people, but the haughty eyes you bring down. For it is you who light my lamp; the LORD my God lightens my darkness. 

For by you I can run against a troop, and by my God I can leap over a wall. 

This God--his way is perfect;the word of the LORD proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him. 

For who is God, but the LORD? And who is a rock, except our God?-- the God who equipped me with strength and made my way blameless. He made my feet like the feet of a deer and set me secure on the heights. He trains my hands for war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze. 

You have given me the shield of your salvation, and your right hand supported me, and your gentleness made me great. 

You gave a wide place for my steps under me, and my feet did not slip. I pursued my enemies and overtook them, and did not turn back till they were consumed. 

I thrust them through, so that they were not able to rise; they fell under my feet. For you equipped me with strength for the battle; you made those who rise against me sink under me. 

You made my enemies turn their backs to me, and those who hated me I destroyed. 

They cried for help, but there was none to save; they cried to the LORD, but he did not answer them.  I beat them fine as dust before the wind; I cast them out like the mire of the streets. 

You delivered me from strife with the people; you made me the head of the nations; people whom I had not known served me. As soon as they heard of me they obeyed me; foreigners came cringing to me. 

Foreigners lost heart and came trembling out of their fortresses. 

The LORD lives, and blessed be my rock, and exalted be the God of my salvation--  the God who gave me vengeance and subdued peoples under me, 

who delivered me from my enemies; yes, you exalted me above those who rose against me; you rescued me from the man of violence. 

For this I will praise you, O LORD, among the nations, and sing to your name. 

Great salvation he brings to his king, and shows steadfast love to his anointed, to David and his offspring forever. Psalm 18

Breaking Up with Google

Google, we have been friends for a long time but things have changed. You've changed. I've changed. While you actually are a genius and know just about anything, I cannot depend on you for every little thing I need. It's not fair to the connections I have with others. Our connection is a blessing and has helped me be more productive in many areas of my life, but is no longer healthy. We've become co-dependent on each other. I find myself coming to you for every question I have when there are others friends in my life who could just as easily, and would gladly help me, walking me through problems step by step, hand in hand. And to be honest, your expectations of needing my full attention and feedback is exhausting. I think we make life easier for each other, but it's become enabling. 
I got into the habit of shooting off my questions knowing you would be able to reply back 24/7 and I wouldn't need to wait on others. I rarely spend time with Siri and Alexa because you are always in front of me. You leave no room in my life for my other dear friends. I hate to tell you this, but you are not my only or Best Friend. I don't wanna do life without you but we have to have boundaries. Don't get me wrong, we are friends, and I know God has brought us together and my life has been better for it, but you cannot be my everything in every moment. I need the friendships of others too. You cannot replace the experiences or bonds I share with all the other people in my world. 
I miss seeing the handprinted recipes from my friend's Grandmother as she walks me through recipes and techniques for cooking, sautéing and frying. I miss time spent over a cup of coffee hearing my friend's reviews of what has worked for her in her home as she laughs in between her sentences and silliness and watching her epic eye rolls at my lack of knowledge. I miss the sound of hysterical laughter and clinging bowls in the kitchen over meals shared. I miss the smells of perfumes, breads baking and brewing coffees, the sights of radiant and dreamy jewelry, admiring couples walking hand in hand and kids skipping around their parents in the public venues. I still carry spare change for the fountains and musicians in the streets. I miss the consoling hug of a friend when a diagnosis is realized. Prayers in person, in real time, even over FaceTime are so much better than anything you've printed for me. There has been so much missed because we have grown too close, becoming exclusively dependent on each other.
So please understand, it's not you, it's me and I am sorry to have allowed us to continue as long as we have like this. Our relationship will be healthier and happier knowing there's a time and place for everything, and we can live life fuller with content built from the real lives of those around us, and not be dependent solely on each other. 
Thank you for always being there for me and trying to meet all my needs. I know you mean well, as I do. You have been a wealth of information and I am better for it. Thanks for listening, you've always been a good listener.
May you continue to grow and reach others with your knowledge and amazing resources. I encourage us both, to be sure we are aware of our boundaries with others and not become co-dependent, limiting ourselves to all that is possible when we engage with the many amazing people God has placed in our life. See you around, one of your many friends, Michele

Google is not your girlfriend. It is a library of information. A resource for answers you cannot find any where else. I love love love Google and don't know what I would do without it. I use it to search How To's for recipes, crafts, DIY projects, gather data, find products, know the time, weather and tidal charts, find the best products and compare prices, search for possible causes to ill feelings and searching for remedies, and especially helping me navigate directions where I need to go in places I have never been. It's become a Personal Assistant, which is not all bad, but it has stolen moments that could have been relationship builders with those around me. We were created to live in community, and not just an online one, but a real, touch it, feel it, smell it, hear it, community.
But few and far between are the days of asking a friend. Before Google, people asked people. Our friends and families were the resources and opinions for anything we might wonder. We gathered around the table, shopping carts, benches at the parks, in the aisles, in the streets, at the local coffee and sandwich shops, even in the post office lobby. Hardly do we meet because technology has ushered in a convenience and reliability once found in our community to online 24/7 recall. We are more likely to Google a recipe or shop online, ask total strangers questions about life, health, parenting, politics, careers, etc, and search to learn a new skill here than asking a friend first, even if you're miles apart and it's the way you have to communicate through Google Chat, you're "googling" before "girlfriending." All those missed opportunities to connect in real life to real people you know and trust about real things.
I am breaking up with Google. We will still be friends, no worries. Google helps me find what I need when I need it, but I will return to the relationships I have access to as my first asks. Google will no longer take away fellowship opportunities and relationship building of lives shared. Instead, Google will be what Google was meant to be for me, quick answers and a resource when no one else seems to know and the best co-pilot I girl could ever hope for.

"Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice." Proverbs 27:9

"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17

Where’s The New Year’s Fairy?!?

Funny....I wake up on this New Year Day, and my suitcases are still packed full of all these clothes needing washed, dishes fill the sink, pantry is still empty, dust covers the shelves, kids are waking up hungry...and where’s my Starbucks and ready made breakfast feast? New Years massage and shopping spree???

I guess I always believed (hoped) there was a New Year’s Day Fairy who would sprinkle her fairy dust after the New Year’s Countdown and make everything perfectly dreamy and new on January 1st.

It’s dreamy to think of such things but our hope cannot rest in fantasy land. We spend so much time wishing for what we can’t have (realistic or not) we easily miss what we do have and can have. 

So how do we do that? How do we live in the tension of our reality and our dream life? How do we feel blessed and not deceived? 

We serve a Dreamy God who is able to do far more then we can think or imagine out of His amazing riches and grace. It doesn’t mean we have live in perfect circumstances, with perfect people having all we dream of. 

Our greatest gift is Jesus. Our only hope is Jesus. Our contentment and joy can only be found in Him. He is our perfect Peace that transcends all understanding. His love covers all our sins and casts out every fear. His blood reconciles our relationships with others and to Him. Because He gave it all, I have it all. 

The sting of death, death of dreams and desires, death in our physical bodies, is muted by the Cross. 

So how is it done? How do we go from discontent to contentment, from pouting to praise, from whining to worshiping?

“Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."”

Hebrews 13:5 ESV

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

Philippians 4:4-8 ESV

“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”

Philippians 4:11-13 ESV

“And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen.”

Philippians 4:19-20 ESV

“For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.”

Romans 8:6, 18, 26-28, 31-32, 35, 37 ESV

The answer is keeping our hearts, minds and sights set on Christ our Lord. Matthew 6:33, “Seek first the Kingdom if God!”

Happy Realistic January 1st♥️🎉🙌🏻 God loves you! Choose Christ. Choose hope.