What Spills Out Matters

OOOPPPS!!! TOO MANY THINGS IN MY HANDS!! I was carrying my Carry All bag, my purse, my sunglasses, my coffee mug and my Bible and as I leaned over to grab my keys, CRASH!! My Bible slipped out falling to ground and EVERYTHING fell out. UGH! Really, when is it ever a good time to drop something and have to spend time cleaning it up?!? I think...never!

Past church bulletins, children's color sheets, meeting notes, bookmarks, sermon notes jotted on a piece of paper when I had forgotten my journal. It all fell out. I've always held my Bible close as it was much like a Diary to me and the thought of someone seeing some of my personal notes would have been devastating. It wasn't until I noticed a friend of mine continually opening and sharing her Bible with others that God began to show me how my Bible was something I should be opening wide and not covering up before others. One day she asked me to look something up in hers and the thought crossed my mind how she must really trust me with something so personal. 

God used this "sharing your Bible" thing to teach me on a deeper level that although we should be clinging to and guarding the Word, we should freely give it and share it. Therefore, what's on the inside matters. Taking this to a deeper level...if I open my Bible, or my heart to someone, what will they see inside? What does GOD see inside? I pray goodness and truths and hope are found. Whatever spills out, I pray it's good. This means I must be careful with my choices, and choose wisely what I hold on to.

"For no good tree bears bad fruit, nor again does a bad tree bear good fruit, for each tree is known by its own fruit. For figs are not gathered from thornbushes, nor are grapes picked from a bramble bush. The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks." Luke 6:43-45 

When you are knocked down, what spills out? Good or evil? Good fruit or bad fruit? What you hold onto in your heart matters. Although no one wants to admit that "evil" comes out of us, we must be honest and own our sin. Sin is evil.

"And He said, "What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness.  All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person." Mark 7:20-23 

It is never a good time to get knocked down. But it's only we are put to the test and shaken that what's on the inside can be honestly revealed. When something doesn't go your way, or someone says something ugly or incorrect about you, or even when the warfare against you is strong, what thoughts burst from within your heart and mind...and mouth? Remember that we also have to clean up our spill. The messier it is, the harder and longer it will take to clean up. 

Obviously when we are hurt, we are going to feel hurt, say we are hurt and even shed tears from being hurt, but what is attached to that hurt as it comes out? Gossip, revenge, deceit, bitterness, hatred? Or does your heart immediately cry out to the Lord for Him to take a hold of it as it breaks? Falling at the feet of Jesus and letting Him act on our behalf, strengthening in us at the same time with peace, forgiveness, self-control.

Like the commercial goes, "What's in your wallet?" Today, we must ask "What's in your heart?"

Forgiving and Just God,

How I pray for a heart that pleases You. When life shakes me up, give me eyes to see what You see in me that I may get rid of all the evil inside as it oozes out and fill my heart and soul with all that is good. Guide me Holy Spirit in self-control to make daily choices that led me on a path of goodness and mercy, purity and peace. Help me guard the influences around me, turning from all evil and taking in what is Good. Open my heart Father God and pour into me Your goodness and mercy, Your compassion and love and may I be bolder in sharing it with others. Your Word is a light unto my path, healing to my heart. Help me to hide Your Holy Word, engraving it into the depths of my mind, heart and soul so I may claim it's promises and power and rebuke the evil that tries to penetrate within it. I pray that when it is broken that it bleeds Your Blood which covers all my sin. Thank You Lord for Your perfect love. Be the core of me. Amen.

At the Picnic Table with JESUS!!

The day I "found" Jesus. I have know of the Lord my whole life. I was fortunate to be raised by two parents who loved the Lord and had our family in church every time the doors were open. We served in the Children/Youth ministries, Handbell Choirs, Dramas and Musicals, Communion, Conferences, Mission Trips, Youth Camps, etc. I haven't missed very many Sunday worship services in my lifetime. I am grateful for the foundation of faithfulness laid by my parents.

Although I choose Christ as my own personal Savior in 1986, there were seasons in my life I felt like I couldn't find Him. There was a void in my heart and soul. 2009 was just a season. I was searching and reading in the Word as the restoration process went on. There was just something missing then. I knew He was there with me and yet I felt doubtful. Anxiety is my personal thorn and in times like these, Satan gets in this healing wound and poisons it with thoughts like, "you know He's done being gracious with you," "are you really praying for that again," "He has others with bigger problems than yours," "He doesn't want to hear all your whining," "you're just not smart or special," "the void is because you're not trying hard enough." When really the problem is that I was sinning in my disbelief. I doubted His grace, patience, peace and faithfulness to me to never leave me or forsake me, never give me more than I can bear, and that He is eternal in everything, for everyone!!!

Our family decided to get away for the weekend and headed to a family camp. Each morning I woke up and walked to the lake just down from the cabin to have my quiet time with the Lord. There was a typical picnic table there at the edge where I would sit and read and pray. It was beautiful and quiet. I love being by the water. 

This particular morning I was feeling this great void in my heart and soul. I felt empty. The poison of lies began again. I am just never going to be the same (and He knew better-PRAISE GOD I haven't been!!!), I am not worth His time, This is just my discipline for doubting Him all these years, His time is better spent helping those who are super-Christians, living full out for Him or for those who are hurting so deeply. I was just normal and didn't really matter in the big picture. To my family, I mattered. The World, I could leave and no one would probably notice my absence.

I closed my Bible, laid my head down on the picnic table and prayed, "God, am I more than nothing? Do I really matter? I believe in You and love You more than anyone and anything but I am afraid I have lost value in Your eyes. I want to find You close to me. I want to live a life pleasing to You, not grieving You. Please forgive my whinings. Forgive where I have been a coward. Help me know You better and trust in Your love. Amen." After a few quiet moments, keeping my head down, I opened my eyes. Looking down at the dirt, I found JESUS shining in the dirt.

You will see in the picture above JESUS right there in the dirt. I quickly looked around to see who's it could be...at 6am mind you! JESUS?!?

My wondering soul just anchored down. My mind was centered. My heart leaped! I FOUND JESUS!! WooooHooooo!!!! Sweet JESUS!!!!! He really is near...literally!! This was hysterically awesome!!! I had sat there in that same spot several times and yet, JESUS came that morning to meet with me! What was lost, was found. Sight overcame blindspots. Salvation in a season of needing refuge and strength...and proof with gentle correction. (Keeping it real as there must be correction when we sin.)

I found it and knew it was a message straight for me, and I got it! There was no one around to ask, so I get to keep it right?!? This is totally my new ring that I will never take off!! Well, no. Being a person of strong ethics, I knew I needed to turn it into the office. Someone was missing their JESUS. I walked it up to the office, wishing it could just be mine but knowing the right thing to do. I handed it to the lady telling her where I had found it. She looked at me and said, "Looks like JESUS is yours. No one has reported it missing. If someone comes in asking for it I will call you but otherwise, it's yours."

What joy filled me!!! It was a real-life miracle. A testimony no doubt. How could you possibly doubt something tangible!!!! A tangible message from a listening and speaking God. God knew me and the depths of my heart, mind and soul. He knows that I am a "prove it to me" personality, hence anxiety that makes me question everything. Today, in my moment of doubt, anxious or trial, I can literally cling to my JESUS!! I am reminded He is near. He's on me and I am spoken for!! Amen and Hallelujah!!  

Just as my wedding ring doesn't make me married, neither does this ring make me a Believer. Removing it doesn't remove my relationship to God or my Husband. The rings are outward symbols of the commitment made. Both from me to my Spouse, my Spouse to me, and to my God and my God to me. With my wedding ring on my left and JESUS on my right, I testify that I am committed. I am also spoken for. You cannot have me cuz I am already in The Arms of Ones who love me.

Next time you feel a void, won't you seek, ask and knock. There may not be a ring at your feet when you open your eyes, but there will be proofs. God is not going to leaving you standing at the door, He is going to open it for you. But you must knock! He's invited you, won't you come. Take a seat at His table and enjoy His fellowship. If you don't get an answer, I'd be sure I was knocking at the right door cuz you may be knocking at the wrong door.

Be aware of sinful and poisonous lies. Rebuke them. Know The Truth by being in His Word!!! It's the only way to recognize the lies. In JESUS....

You are NOT nothing! You ARE special!

You are NOT worthless! You ARE worth dying for!

You are NOT hated! You ARE Loved!!

You are NOT stupid! You ARE Wise!!

You are NOT helpless! You ARE powerful!

You are NOT conquered! You ARE a Conqueror!

You are NOT sick! You ARE Healed!! 

You are NOT lost!! You ARE Found!!!

 "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 

For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. Or which one of you, if his son asks him for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a serpent? 

If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!" Matthew 7:7-11

Amen and Hallelujah!!