Finding My "Niche" with The Lord: Me Time vs God's Time

I have come to enjoy my early morning coffee and quiet time with The Lord of Glory. The air is crisp, the transformation of the sky is glorious and peaceful. The birds begin to stir and sing their songs from the treelines. There was a day not too many years past that it was a laborious act for me to rise early (when I didn't have to). I would set the alarm and turn it off and go back to sleep. I knew I needed to and wanted to. Maybe if I hadn't stayed up so late sometimes! But I had found the late evening hours a time of peace and quiet for me to detox from a busy, long day. No one was left to create more mess so it was the only time I could actually pick up and clean up for the next day. But morning came and I was too sleepy to get up and have any kind of focus. But I wanted to have quiet time with God that was sweet and satisfying. The only quiet times I had, I spent cleaning or finally getting to watch my own show. It was really Me Time not God's Time. My husband would tell me, "Go to bed earlier and you can get up earlier" (Easy for him to say...he is a natural morning person whereas I am more of a night owl). But see, he had disciplined himself to do that over that years and it was easier for him. I would eventually learn the same discipline despite my natural late night disposition. 
For years however, I had stayed up late, not able to wake up early, then, conviction consumed me and I would tell God, "Later today." Later today meant I would squeeze it in somewhere and my deep study time often turned into a quick 10min devotion as I waited for the kids to get off the school bus. Oddly, I would wake up wide awake at 3am. I came to realize it was God poking at me to get my attention. It appeared to be the only time of the day I was still and truly His. At first, I thought it was really cool but then it saddened me that He had to do that. Now when that happens, I am thankful because I know it's bonus time and He wants to be with me. They are some of the sweetest moments for me now. I know it's not because I haven't spoken to Him, it's just more time.
As time went on, convictions chiseled away at my lack of determination and lack of self-control. One day, I prayed. (Genius I know!) I prayed and asked God to help me discipline myself at night so I could rise early since it was my heart's desire to be able to really meet with Him. I had had enough and was tired of letting myself down. And He answered. I have heard it said, "Our house is a Home, not a Hotel." It was time to hold the family accountable to do their part in keeping it clean and running well. My mornings began to shift. And God started to meet with me. If my alarm was set for 5:30am, He would sit me straight up in my bed at 5:20am just as He had done for His 3am wake up calls. I was the craziest thing. I don't know how it happened, but God...His timing was perfect. And so the discipline began to shape my heart, my mind and tired body. 
Things had to change. It took great discipline to establish new cleaning routines at the end of the day with the kids helping to clean as we go so I didn't end up doing it all myself and having to stay up late. During the day, I have learned to get my chores done before 1pm. Sure, there are days things don't go according to plan and nights dishes and toys get left out but I know I will have to adjust and face them tomorrow and not grumble about the choice or circumstances from the day before. It rarely happens, but it's okay when it does. Life happens and I will always choose people over projects (thank you Pastor Tony for that reminder.) 
In the beginning, I got up and sat limp and glossy-eyed staring at my Bible Study, yet eager. As time went on, my mind processed quicker, my eyes grew clearer, my heart softened and my body began to crave the early morning feast of Bread & Water (and coffee!). Me Time turned into God's Time.
I may meet with Him, but I don't always study in the early mornings. Every season calls for a different pattern. When the kids were much younger, I knew nights could be interrupted making an early morning wake up an unfocused one, so I enjoyed meeting the Lord at their afternoon nap time every day at 2pm. As they grew older, nights were less interrupted, naps went away and I was able to get up early. When all the kids were in school and I had the time alone in the house, with discipline not to keep doing chores, I scheduled my study and quiet time sometime during the day before they returned home. 
For the past couple of years now, I have gotten into a similar routine. I am eager to rise early, make my cup of hot coffee and sit outside and pray. (I find that inside I am distracted to do something like clean or make breakfast.) Depending on the day or or how I am feeling (eager or exhausted), I may pull out my study material but I plan to take a study time later in the day before the kids return home from school. (I understand Homeschooling Moms-I did it too and you don't have a kid-free hour, but I encourage you to have specific quiet study time where Mom and kids have scheduled time of quiet whether they are also reading, doing homework or resting. Just make sure there is no moving around the house and no distractions or disruptions. It takes a few times to implement this intentional time but it will happen!) 
Once the kids are home from school, (project time is over), my focus turns to the family (people, not projects), they are the mission field God has given me. It is nearly impossible to have uninterrupted time to focus and study anyway, I know, I tried! I can do general reading, but not study. If I wait to study at night, I am usually too tired or I am needing to spend time with the hubby. So, my only guarded time for study and prayer is early morning or a day time hour alone. No matter what, every day begins and ends with prayer and acknowledgement of Him. "And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed." Mark 1:35. I can't help but wonder if this is why He went so early before He began His day's work serving others...He would not be interrupted and His Father was probably just as eager to meet with Him as The Son was. 
Honestly, there are days I don't get to sit down and study like I wish I could. Life happens. But I rest knowing that God knows my heart and sees my desire for Him daily, even if means I didn't get out pen and paper. I don't beat myself up over it either. Just as in any relationship, when we know the intentionality of the heart, we cherish and embrace the times we are together and look forward in anticipation to the next time whenever that may be, hopefully sooner than later!! My love for Him is not lazy!! So, be patient with yourself as you try new disciplines throughout your day and night to accomplish your goals with God! He will certainly do His part to be there, will you?!?
I share my own personal prayer and study habits as an encouragement (hopefully) to someone out here in BlogWorld who is needing some encouragement to find their niche. People can become so legalistic about "Quiet Times" about when and how they must be done, but I think time with the Lord is supposed to be an intentional time spent focused on Him and that will vary for each person and each season of their life. We are all in different places with different life circumstances and different types of jobs. But God is the Same! He just wants to meet with you right where you are. We must finally say Enough! and meet with Him out of love, not obligation, not because we have to or ought to, but because we sincerely desire to rest in Him and seek Him with all our heart to purpose our life and day. The old saying is true...you get out of it what you put into it. 
When we find our special niche of time with our Lord, our heart's will be filled with energy  purpose, joy and focus. His joy will be our strength. His ways will be our ways. Me Time becomes God's Time and nothing is sweeter or more satisfying!! "For a day in Your courts is better than a thousand elsewhere." Psalm 84:10a Amen!!

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will hear you. You will seek Me and find Me, when you seek Me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13 ESV 

"Unless the LORD builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for He gives to His beloved sleep." Psalm 127:1-2 ESV

" "And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways, to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the LORD, which I am commanding you today for your good? Behold, to the LORD your God belong heaven and the heaven of heavens, the earth with all that is in it. Yet the LORD set His heart in love on your fathers and chose their offspring after them, you above all peoples, as you are this day. Circumcise therefore the foreskin of your heart, and be no longer stubborn." Deuteronomy 10:12-16 ESV