Finding Jesus on the outside of your book!

It's that time of year again! Time to join the next Bible Study. Women's Bible studies have been a part of my journey for many, many, many years and anticipation grows with each one. Oh the joy of knowing something great is going to happen in the heavenly world we live in and the one we can touch and feel here. 
Week by week, new friendships are established and old ones strengthen, minds are blown at new truths learned and hearts softened and God's healing balm binds our wounds. Our spirits rejoice at the gathering, can you even imagine what He must feel when His children come to Him and ask for His love, assurance, direction and courage, peace and healing, wisdom and hope!?! We come feeling inadequate but eager to know our Father Better. You know He must leap off the Throne and smile! Do you think He exclaims HALLELUJAH!?! I bet He does!
Today, our small group gathered for our first day of Entrusted. As I prayed over our gathering time, God opened my eyes to something I hadn't really thought of and I shared it with the ladies, and I would like to share it with you too for the sake of deeper and wider growth as we enter in.
When we join a study and face the soul-searching, Scripture-homework, the tough questions, learning about God, learning about ourselves, we are seeking something more. More of what though? More than what we have. This week, God opened my eyes to look beyond the workbook itself. To see more than the Q&A's being asked of me. What happens on the outside of the book is just as important as what happens on the inside. Both have direct impacts on heart change. I have never focused on what happens on the outside of the covers of these books. Reflecting back, I see what He is talking about. 
Take the workbook away and ask a group of women to set aside 45 minutes of uninterrupted time every day to pray and worship and then a 2 hour time away to talk every week about their experiences, for 8 weeks and you've already seen a miracle! Then, we add into these moments, actual heart-work. Some chiseling and others mending work. It is exhausting and exhilarating at the same time. 
There is nothing like it when we intentionally get on the same page as God, with our Sisters. We grow in unique ways, one of which is accountability. When we join a study with other women, we are saying I don't want to do this alone, I want you to do it with me. We are committing ourselves as much to each other as we are to the personal study commitment between us and the Lord. We are saying I am going to walk this road with you and we will figure this out and help each other as we go. We are agreeing that our spirits can trust The One Who has gathered this specific group together at this specific time, for such a time as this to honestly share. We are gathering expecting to glimpse an extra dose of reality and strength. To know we are not the only ones struggling to answer question 4, page 26. To hear we are not the only woman stuck in a certain bad habit or behavior. To realize I am not the only one giving it my all I have and seeing no fruit, yet. To confirm something I have wondered. To be refreshed in Sisterhood blessings of laughter and hugs.
So often we see Bible study as the commitment to answered questions on the pages when what God is searching for is hearts falling deeper in Love's Name. Any Bible study we do, we ought to be looking for Jesus, on and off the pages. 
If you are new to a study or jumping back into one soon, I challenge you, I encourage you to look beyond the pages for what God has planned for you. Maybe your discipline for daily time management needs to be sharpened. Perhaps perfectionism or anxiety or shame might be overcome by the hugs and help of humility by way of vulnerability. There are probably a hundred different ways our Mighty and Gracious God uses to draw us closer to Him. 
Sister, He wrote The Book, cover to cover. Ask Him to reveal Himself to you in a fresh way this time. He is a faithful, jealous God. There is none more creative and awesome in power than He, so expect great things, in great ways...in many ways!  
I am so excited now to get started!!!!! Can't wait to find more of Jesus!!!           

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:9

Saying YES!!!!

There comes a time when you just have to make a Declaration. A Commitment. Saying "Yes" is what takes wishing and hoping to being and doing. Saying "Yes" is what causes a Girlfriend to be a Wife. Saying "Yes" makes a lost person saved. Changing jobs, helping others, making any change, begins with a point of declaration to accept the change. A Commitment starts with a declaration. Commitments to walk the dog, take out the trash, run an errand, volunteering, can be seemingly small and yet, if they are not made, they are not done. Commitments can be huge life altering decisions- embracing a new career, changing relationships, family planning. At some point, you have said, "Yes."
I recently had someone ask me how I finally overcame my fear and anxiety. I wish I could have given a Hollywood scripted story of how I prayed that one prayer or attended a church service that changed me, or that I had a dream I was healed and I woke up to that reality. My counselor and my mentor told me it would be a process and boy were they right! It certainly was a process.
Day by day, I learned, studied, prayed, received counsel, processed, memorized, struggled within, hoped and wished upon The Word of God. I liken the process to loosing weight...you don't notice the first pound lost or the second. It's not until the third and fourth pounds that you notice the loose pants. Before you know it, one day you step on the scale and you have lost 6lbs. People around you begin to take notice and you can feel it. You knew it, but you didn't feel the 6lbs drop. And yet, there is a day of realization of a new truth! You have lost the weight! Awesome!!!
I do believe God can bring a sudden healing, be it emotional, physical or spiritual. I have experienced those as well. God is our Healer and our Rescue. But God's ways are not man's way. His way is not found in The Handbook of Quick Fixes, which is what we all wish for. So, my friend asked me, how did I know I had been healed, that my bondage to fear was gone. I knew I was stronger. I had less moments of panic and despair and more moments of hope. Truth, courage, clarity, comfort began to fill me, leaving less and less room for anxiousness, fear or worry, defeat or despair. With every prayer, every study, every scripture memorized, I fought for the next breath of peace. My only hope was the Prince of Peace, The Living Water and my daily Bread. All I could do was focus on the basics of being alive. Weeks and Months passed and as I dropped each "weight" I was healthier!There came a moment when I had to declare, "I am free!!" I knew God had lifted "one pound" at a time off of me and I was ready to commit to loosing the rest and keeping the "weight" off. It was time to celebrate victory!
April 4, 2009 was such a day for me! Everything that I had gone through and learned about myself and my God, was ready to be put into practice. It was time to stand firm! I felt free and knew how to be free, and I just needed to commit to being free! Now, that prayer of declaration was a defining moment of change. It is like the moment the Groom slips on the ring of his Bride's finger. That was it. They declared it official as they turned around facing their family and friends and sealed it all up with a kiss! From that moment on, they would walk and live as husband and wife. That sunny April day, which happened to be my Birthday, I made that commitment. I chose that day whom I would serve. I chose to trust The Lord my God for my protection, provision and my peace. Feasting on The Word every day, and He strengthened me. It began to consume and direct my heart, mind and soul! My spirit has been set free from that bondage of fear!! AMEN!!!
Now, in that moment, I did feel the weight lifted off my heart! It was such a freeing moment. I wonder if Peter had that same feeling when he stuck his toes in the water and found a foundation upon which he could stand! Hope and Anticipation filled my once hopeless and defeated body, mind and spirit. That was Day One of a life set free from the bondage of fear and anxiety! My counselor and mentors were right, it was a process and I needed to keeping moving forward, hoping, trusting and faithfully focused on Christ alone! Besides, our lives are not even about us. Yes we are a Light and Ambassador of Christ, but we are living for God, loving on behalf of God!! Our very being is about and because of God!!! I was not created for me....but God!
Sure, there have been moments of anxiousness and times when fear has come at me, but I am remaining faithful to the commitment I made back on that Beautiful April day, to place all my trust and hope and strength in The Lord God Almighty who rescues, remembers, provides and protects!

What process do YOU need to begin healing of? What do YOU need to declare today?! Is there something you need to choose to get victory over? What do you believe has more "weight" in you- fear or faith? Doubts or The Defender? Bondages or Beauty? What in YOUR life do you need to commit YES to overcoming in Jesus' Name?

God, YOU are my VICTORY!! Phil 4:13

God, I WILL serve You!! Joshua 24:15b

God, I will TRUST You!! Romans 8:31-39