So, this morning I sat down for the royal treatment of low-lights and a few snips at the ends. She asked me the typical questions of style and color preferences I replied back with ,"Whatever-just no rainbow colors in my hair and no buzzing to cut my hair." I am open to anything not-crazy!! My personality can't pull off a Spunky or Attention-Getting hairstyle.
NOT SO with the lady who was sat in the chair next to me! She knew exactly what she wanted and she placed her order! The stylist stood there shaking her head, probably thankful to have a little (a lot actually) direction. I thought, "Wow, she knows that she knows what she wants and why she wants it." "I'm a 6 figure salary professional and this is what I need to represent to my clients and the bosses...." and on and on she continued with her "order." What confidence she had to boldly proclaim her need. She made it very clear what she wanted and what she didn't want. Unable to see her (or avoid hearing her), I could picture her in my head and once I saw her after- yep, there was the lady with the order for "long layers, choppy and highlighted dark hair and not brassy."
Her boldness seemed border line arrogant and bossy and yet, she had an assurance of what she wanted. I found myself feeling a little small and weak-willed. It's not something others can see within you, but you who struggle with anxiety or inadequacy know that heart sinking feeling. I can quickly be brought back to inferior thoughts about myself and my abilities although, praise God, He quickly captures those thoughts and shows me His!!
Now, I recognize there are different "personalities" and that I don't have an aggressive one but there is truth that I need more confident-courage and this is an area of my life I am growing in. I have a friend who refers to me as, "Her friend on Valium"). And another friend partners with me in ministry and friendship and I am most certainly The Good Cop and she is The Bad Cop. It's true...not much makes me angry quickly. I am very patient most often and tend to extend extra mercy...however, we all have hot buttons. I am challenged in my passiveness to be assertive and have a confident approach for those things I know I want or need, or don't want or need...especially spiritual things.
Ecclesiastes teaches us there is a season for everything and we know that God created us to fit in harmony with one another, and how much more efficient a working Body when all things work together, with confident assurance?! There's not room for passiveness when there are specific needs waiting to be met.
God has been good to me and I think funny at times, to place soooo many Courageously Confident people in my life, one being my husband of over 20 years! He is certainly the "Ask for forgiveness rather than ask for permission" type, while I hardly ever move without permission!!! I have a few friends whom I will not mention any names who are the same in my life. They have gumption, courage, and assertiveness to do what they know they need or want to do! These "God's Go Getters" have pushed me outside of my well established comfort-zone frequently! That's one of the beautiful things about Proverbs 27:17, "As iron sharpens iron," that there will be refining sparks when our jagged edges encounters theirs, and we are more finely sharpened in our heart and spirit because we have engaged and encountered one another, which is ultimately heart to heart and spirit to spirit.
So, as I sat there in my pampering chair, God used my captured attention to speak into my heart. Michele, come to Me with that kind of confidence to Me in who I Am. Rest assured that I am working in your life and in those whom you bring to Me. You can trust me, I assure you. Stand with confidence that I am with you and have gone before you already, you need not be afraid. Ask with boldness what you need. You have permission to ask for what you want, be it for yourself or another. I am The God who satisfies, creates, provides and helps. I am above all things and will be your strength, healing and victory.
God doesn't call us to bark out orders to Him, arrogantly assuming our "order will be right out" but rather humbly approach His throne of grace and abundance with confidence: "Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need." Hebrews 4:16 and James 1:6 says, "But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind."
"For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of His glory He may grant you to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith--that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." Ephesians 3:14-21
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