Are you missing out on the real thing?

"No creme, and no sugar." That's how my friend takes her coffee...black! Personally, I think she's crazy. All those yummy flavors to choose from to mix in!! How can she drink it "plain?" I have asked her and her response is this: "You miss the original, intended flavor of the coffee when you add all the artificial stuff to it." I am thinking, "Yes, that's exactly what makes it sooooo delicious!" Her reply is always, "You're missing out on the real thing!"
As much as I (respectfully) disagree in regards to my coffee "enhancers", God used this last coffee date to encourage and teach me. When we add "stuff," we take away from the original. How true this is in life. There are things we add into our friendships, our marriages, our schedules, our parenting process, our worship, and even our coffee than can completely void out the "original core" of what it was originally created for. 
We fill our days with unnecessary stresses or avoiders through busyness or laziness or selfishness and it keeps us from completing what needs to be done. 
We fill our relationships with surface conversations, selfishness, jealousy, unrealistic expectations, that we miss the beauty of what sharing life is intended to do in our soul. 
We fill our marriages with selfishness, "stuff" and expectations, that we live by feelings and not by covenant. 
We fill our kids heads with all the rules and expectations and totally miss on shepherding their hearts and spirits towards the Lord.
We fill our hearts with temporary pleasures, fears, pride and even close them off to others, that we miss being filled with purity and unconditional Love. 
When we add "stuff" to our worship, we can easily find ourselves worshiping worship and not the creator and receiver of who worship is intended for. 
There are enhancers and there are overtakers! If I add a little coffee to my milk, I have Coffee-Milk which is nothing like coffee....at all! If I add a little milk to my coffee, I have Coffee with a hint of smooth, taking off the bitterness of the bean. But, if I add whip creme, heavy cream, vanilla and cinnamon, or go for a White Chocolate Mocha, extra creme and add the whip, for example, it's like getting a dessert, not a coffee! I can simply enhance or completely change my coffee to not really be "coffee." God instructs us to encourage one another and "as iron sharpens iron", we too ought to love and serve (with humility) one another. The Holy Spirit is our Enhancer. When we follow His lead, we live "enhanced" lives. But if I make everything about me, I overtake what God has planned. I want to be an Encouragement Enhancer, not a Distractor or Overtaker! God's ways are better than ours!!! 
God, give me eyes to see the things in life that are enhancers, and help me know when I begin to overtake something and loose sight of the original. Help me seek after You Lord God in everything I say and do, that You would be glorified and lifted up. May my friendships, my home, my family, my worship, my relationship with You, be filled with the enhancers You have gifted in this life to bring me closer to You and remove from before me all things that hinder and draw me away from You. Be forever, the center of everything in my life! "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer. " (Psalm 19:14). Amen.

"If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth....Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. 14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:1-2, 12-17

"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. 2 So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory. 3 Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. 4 So I will bless you as long as I live; in your name I will lift up my hands. 5 My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food, and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips, 6 when I remember you upon my bed, and meditate on you in the watches of the night; 7 for you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy. 8 My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me." Psalm 63:1-8

Cute is Cute and Sexy is Sexy

Thought I'd share a real life example of a Girl Gone Wild as described in my current bible study. It is exactly the message I have been reflecting on over recents months regarding purity.

I watched as my husband encountered a temptress last night at the gym. He was stretching before his workout on 1 of the 3 benches when a woman, barely dressed came up to the same bench, and put her leg up next to his. Startled, he looked up at her only to be met with her chest bulging out of a lace halter top as she bent over in a stretch over her leg, extending from her short shorts. He could not help but see what was being tossed right infront of him. He quickly put his leg down and turned around and sat on the floor to continue stretching. Praise God he had the self-control to turn away. 

What was she thinking?!? What was he now thinking?!? 

It breaks my heart and makes my stomach sick thinking that women, of any age-our young children, teens and adults- have a desire to flaunt out what should be guarded as precious in an attempt to what...get attention?!? To Feel special or pretty? You would hope this woman wasn't thinking in her head "I want to seduce that man and ruin his mind and family." She probably was selfishly wanting affirmation and fulfillment in her desire as a beautiful woman as the woman in Proverbs 7 in our study.

I have 2 dear friends whose families have been recently devastated by pornography. It's a HUGE and destructive industry. We can blame the man for looking but shouldn't the sensuous woman be held accountable too?!? Sometimes it's thrown right in your face. He wasn't at a nude beach or a men's club. This was at our family gym and it happens everywhere, even on our phones now a days.

Women, we must be careful how we dress walking out the door and be aware of the looks we give men being friendly. I don't know about you but I can sense the flirt, and if you are near someone giving you a little flirt, flee! While we cannot control others, we are accountable to ourself. 
Cute can be cute, but sexy is sexy. And sexy belongs behind closed doors!! 

Ladies, we must PRAY PRAY PRAY for the men in our lives! Be it our spouses, Dad's, brothers, husbands, sons, nephews, friends, co-workers, we must stand for their purity and pray for their eyes to be blinded to all the Wild Things available to them. It's a HUGE war!! 

It took one look at the girls at the school drop off line at the middle school and high schools to see what the girls were wearing for me as a Mom to begin petitioning harder for the purity of not only my own boys, but for the girls in our community too. I prayed for value and affirmations to be found within them, not from outward confirmations. For them to choose to respect themselves and those around them enough to not want attention that draws themselves or others to sin. 
Would my teens be strong enough to quickly turn away from the beautiful, good smelling, flesh revealing girls? Since I could not dress the girls myself, it was then I began praying first for the girls to become aware of their value and see themselves as valued and treasured, not something to be promoted for approval of the opposite sex. I became diligent praying for my boys to be blinded and shielded from the alluring flesh in front of them. I have seen this happen in my husband and in me so I know God can do that. He blinds us from things He knows we won't be able to not see. Other times, He helps our spirits to not see. I began pleading with God to help them be quick to turn their eyes and attention if it was laid obvious before them across the bench.
As for my husband, he is bombarded all day in this sex-driven culture and doors are always open for him. Sexual temptation is a serious war that must be fought for people of all ages and status, married or single. As his wife, it is imperative I stand in this battlefield with him. As his wife, I must war with him on his behalf that temptation would be quickly fled from and avoided. I am so proud of his strength and conviction to bounce his eyes (term from Every Man's Battle, book). There are always women on the other side of a bench looking for attention, so we must continue to intercede on behalf of our men, guarding ourselves too.

For the record, it's not just the woman who are the tempters. Boys/Men do it too wearing tight fitting jeans and shirts, giving off alluring signals, dawning their manly colognes, flaunting their body like Fabio. Men, just like women, have a need to feel wanted and noticed.

Thanks for letting me share this with you. This is a Gospel issue more than a purity issue and one people don't talk about frequently enough. 
"But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body." 1 Corinthians 6:17-20

May it start with us coming humbly before our God asking Him to bring to heart anything within us that does not honor True Womanhood in Christ's name by which we were created. There may be some things in our own lives we need to purge, or begin to value as precious once again. May we stand firm and courageous fighting on this huge battlefield for the sake of Christ. May we fervently petition on behalf of our men and boys to be blinded and disgusted by flesh that devours and treasure up the beauty that God intends to be the delight of their souls. Let it begin with us. Let us pray for our loved ones' purity and strength to cling to what is good and holy and flee quickly from temptation that leads to gratifying selfish and sinful desires.  

"Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30

Praying Blessings and Purity of Body, Mind and Heart for each of us! May the Lord be the apple of our eye just as we are to His. To God be all the Glory, body, mind and spirit.

SURFS UP!!! Are you protected?

"What happened?" "Did something happen with one of the kids?" "What set you off?!?"

These were the questions several of you were sweet and curious enough to ask after a recent Facebook post about "Issues." For those who did not see it, here's the post:

SOOOOO hard to let go of your children, even when you trust God and know God is in control!!! I know I have peers and younger ones on my Facebook, so I will say this to both:

Parent to Parent: PLEASE CHECK YOUR KIDS PHONES AND EMAILS AND FBK MESSAGES!!!! Yes, takes extra time and they may not like it, but it's important for them to know they are still under your accountability and authority and i

t's our responsibility to set boundaries and correct bad choices. Don't put your child's friend in the position to have to go tell a parent! Every Parent should already know!!! Be in their DIGITAL WORLD and ask about what they've seen and heard each day.
Grieves my heart to hear what goes on even in JUNIOR HIGH!!! Makes me struggle with "control" and letting them go. Phil 4:13, trusting He is in control!!!
Blogging about DIGITAL Parental Controls tomorrow!! Then hopefully Thursday, SPIRITUAL Parent Controls. Parents, we need each other!!! Where two or more are gathered...!

Teens: PLEASE REMEMBER THAT DIGITAL FOOTPRINTS ARE PERMANENT!!!! In these days, what you put out there can instantly be shared with all the world!!! Everything done in darkness will come to Light! If you want someone to tell you you're beautiful/handsome and worthy, give yourself to GOD, not immature boys/girls! You're value and image is reflected in Christ! Hold on to it and guard it!! You are wonderfully made and created for a purpose!!!!! You don't deserve anything less than what God has planned for you!!! If someone wants a piece of you, make them go through your Abba Daddy to get to you!!!! Christians, hold each other accountable!! Help each other be pure and strong!!! Where two or more are gathered....Honor your Father!!

And there it is....yep, I was at the end of my rope with EVERYTHING!!! Ever have one of these kid of days...or weeks...inside-out and backwards!

Well, I was! No matter what I did right it only seemed that 2 things would go wrong. One step forward and two steps back, so it seemed. Just a "toss in the towel" week, or two actually.

Without getting into specifics about who and what, I will share my "issue." Bottom line is technology can be very dangerous. I cannot believe these words are about to come out of my mouth (I'm actually old enough to say it-wow), but BACK IN MY DAY, there weren't computers in the home that could access something called the internet and there weren't cell phone that not only will allow you to talk to anyone, anywhere and even via live stream but they can also access anything you could could possibly want in the world...any item, any information. 

Just like anything, there is a choice...it is a choice you have to make cuz these things in of themselves are not evil but we choose to use them for good or evil. I receive inbox messages often from others thanking me for the encouraging words shared on Facebook while so many others spew hatred or junk out there. I choose to use my life and the resources God has given me to bless, not curse. Not bragging but sharing the strength and joy that comes from having a personal relationship with Christ and choosing to live a life, best as this sinner is able, to honor Him. 

With the privileges we all have with things (fame, money, technology, etc) there comes with it responsibility to use it responsibly and for the Christian-respectfully and honoring Christ. We have the choice to use our things for good or evil, and it is our responsibility to set up whatever boundaries necessary to make sure we do. If we struggle with overeating, we should stay away from buffets. If we struggle with alcohol, we should stay away from environments or people who drink. If we gamble, we should stay away from money-pits. If we struggle with purity, we should have major filters on our "media." Whatever our vice, we need accountability and filters!

This brings me back to my post! DIGITAL Parental Controls! WE...THE PARENTS...MUST put them on EVERYTHING!!! I didn't even realize what was out there and what all my different gadgets could do. The Wii, PS3, Desktop and IPhones/Cells all have access to the internet. Unless you put up blocks or filters, they can look up anything!!!! Stuff you don't want them to see. While there is a ton of awesome uses for the internet, we need to set those guards up so our kids are only able to be in the "safety zone."

I am shocked at the things I see on the Internet with teens pictures! And it's not just the girls!!! Guys are flexing and showing undergarmets too, all talking about their weekend happenings. Are there really that many parties going on out there?!? And the things texted, wow! Conversations these days progress faster than "back in my day." I always wonder what the parent would do if they actually saw or read what their child had just posted or sent. When my kids come home and tell me what they've seen, I immediately say a prayer for the parent to please find out. I too want to know what my kids are up to. It should not be up to another child to report the misuse of media to their friend's parent. I doubt anyone would ever actually do that.

What if every parent were active in their own kids phones/computers? What if there were filters in place that prevented adult content to leak out into our kid's worlds, even for us adults who struggle with our own purity temptations. There is much that NO ONE needs to see. We shared a statistic in our SS Class a few weeks ago that the Pornography Industry profits more than all the Sporting Industries combined!! That's a LOT!! And we wonder why many marriages are being destroyed, sex-trafficking is on the rise and why it's so hard to find a show or movie that is void of sexual content!

So, I am a Mom on Mission to protect the Digital purity of my home, that includes my husband and I, our children, as well as any guests that come into our home. While we cannot protect them at every turn, and I wish I could force filters out to everyone under the age of 18, we have the responsibility and ability to do what we can. Filtering 75% is better than 0%. (Yes there are the legal warnings that you must be 18 or older, but what good is that if the child has the password!?!)

I am in the process of learning myself what our legal and moral consequences/responsibilities are, I hope to put together a little workshop for parents but I wanted to put a feeler out there and see if anyone would even be interested in digging in, getting the information and having accountability with it. If so, please email me.

Meanwhile...for you ITunes people...did you know that Apps and ITunes have ratings?!?! I had no clue! I have officially removed YouTube, ITunes and App Store from all the cells. If we want to see something on there, it can be done at home on the desktop where there is accountability and a history. If someone wants to make a purchase, it must go through Mom or Dad since only we know the password (for every device!!!) and all purchases can be seen on the ITunes desktop. Even if a purchase isn't made, scrolling aimlessly through the App store can be dangerous too, just reading about all the apps with MA ratings and seeing the promo pictures is too much for little eyes.

So, I challenge and encourage you to take charge for the DIGITAL purity in YOUR OWN home!!!! No, your kids will probably not like it cuz like we already established, there is some good and they may simply be having fun, but it only takes a spark to get a fire going! If you or your spouse are the ones who struggle with DIGITAL purity, then change the passwords, put on stricter filters, get accountability and counsel and pray, pray, pray!!!! There is nothing God cannot free you from.

I am eager to learn what I can to clean my home from the inside out!! Remember that it is your responsibility to clean yours!!!! To GOD be the glory in every digit of our world.

*EMAIL me if you'd want to take a class from me which would be basics on what I will have learned and implemented in my own home. SURFS UP!!! 

Michele

happymomfour@comcast.net