I know, you can't help it...we, speaking from the person sitting on the pews, look at those in our church in leadership positions and expect, or maybe assume perfection from them. Surely, if they are called into ministry not only must they have an "inside line" to God, they must be all-knowing and therefore all-doing in The Word. They've trained right? So they know everything about the Bible and live it out perfectly, right? Wrong.
There was a time those used to be my truthful assumptions about those in ministry, until we served on staff back beginning in 1991 and have continued to serve in leadership roles within the church. We are certainly NOT perfect.
As it happens, the more time you spend with someone, the more you get to know them. Serving together, you obviously spend more time together outside the church walls planning and serving and you have opportunities to see them in their "home" environment. You get to see those moments of exhaustion, hurt, frustration, waiting, not-knowing, illness, struggles. You get to see them. It's often a guard that is very hard for them to let down all the way.
I would put those in ministry with those who serve as emergency personnel and counseling professionals....for that matter, even a parent. They may clock out at 5pm, but they do not check out at 5pm. Their emails and cells must be kept ready and available for those who need help. It takes great discipline to be fully "at home" when you are at home with your family, and rest, and be Mommy or Daddy and a Spouse.
God has blessed Josh and I hugely with the majority of our dearest and closest friends being called and now serving in full time ministry. Our friends are lead Pastors, Associates Pastors, Deacons, Women Ministers, Music Ministers, Children's Ministers, Youth Ministers. While they are the same person with us on vacation as they are at the pulpit of their local church, the way in which we relate to them depends on where we are. We immediately come under the authority of our friend when they step into their role as "pastor" over us. You don't toss out high-5's and joke around so casually and poke fun at each other. There is a respect you have for them as authority over you in the House of the Lord that is different.
My heart breaks when I see those in ministry under attack for making a mistake. Do we really think they won't? (Understanding there is a difference between foolishness and unintentional.) The scriptures tell us that "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" and that is "all." That includes those in ministry, at any level.
There are expectations that those of us in ministry put on ourselves as we desire to reflect Christ perfectly, show God's Oneness through our prefect little marriage and exactly how to "train up" our perfect little children in the Lord, all the while having perfect behaviors, perfect words, perfect answers, all to the glory of God. We try to be the perfection of Christ all the while exhausting ourselves and beating ourself up on the inside from failing to be able to be,....perfect.
Then for those of us sitting on the pews, we expect and assume perfection from those standing before us, telling us what and how our walk and our sin and our family should be like. "Who are they to say that when they...."
How clever is Satan to create such a black hole of judgement and condemnation within the Body in which whose sole desire is to honor him!
Those in ministry are just like you an me. They came from the womb- just like us, were created in the image of God- just like us, they sin- just like us, they struggle- just like us and they work hard at what they do in their career- just like us. They are flesh- just like us. Their hearts get hurt, grow tired and weary, their children talk back and disobey, they have bills to pay- just like us. They are human. Let's not forget that.
In times of failures or struggles, those in ministry need to be reminded of grace with truth in love, you are just human-just like us. The difference is they have been called to Shepherd a flock for the Lord's Sake and while there is a great weight of responsibility, I am not denying the gravity of their accountability before the Lord. They will be held with accountability as they stand before the Lord for their personal walk with the Lord as well as giving account for the many God gave them responsibility for in His Name. Just as the Husband will give account for those in his family's spiritual condition, so will the Pastor of his family at home and his Church Family. That's a heavy burden!
I say all this to say, may we give grace and realistic expectations to those God has placed in authority over us in our church. Honor them, respect their leadership, understanding they are fearfully and reverently serving the Lord with excellence. They carry enough weight on their own accord without us adding more.
Be kind and helpful, speaking truth in love when necessary. Offer hospitality and support, affirm their service to the Body, and pray, pray, pray for them as the attacks spiritually are great that they would be deeply rooted into God's fertile soil and resist devastation in times of crisis. Pray for balance in their roles within the church and outside. Pray for them to have times of consistent joyful rest. Pray for their personal walks with the Lord be rich and satisfying, alive, fruitful and invigorating!
Let us in the pews be loyal as we serve as another part of the Body with them. Really, we are all called into ministry as Disciples of Christ. That reality hit me in the gut at one time and awoke me to my own responsibility, the burden I carry with all parts of the Body. Think about it, the neck must hold up the head and yet I must have a head to function! It takes a body to be a Body! Together, we are a Body as Believers in Christ Jesus.
If God has allowed you to be a friend of a leader/minister, be a loyal friend to them. Come alongside and be genuine, be available, give them freedom to breath and absolutely, especially, be a safe place of confidentiality, encouragement and sharpening. Be friends without titles. What a rich friendship it is when you can not only serve together, but play together, sharing all aspects of your life with them. That is a trusted treasure!
So, whether you are the one in ministry or the one on the pew, remember the standard of perfection you are looking for can only be achieved by the Lord our God. Understand your humanness. There is such freedom when we acknowledge our imperfection and expect there to be mistakes even as we strive for excellence. (No, that does not give us permission to sin, rather comforting humility to know that despite our best efforts, we will sin in moments we miss the mark.)
May Satan's black hole not suck us into despair when we do, but may we stand firm on the Rock, our Sure Foundation, Who gives us strength and saving love! God, help us to give and receive grace upon grace for His Name's Sake remembering that we are redeemed! You Lord God Almighty are All To Us and no one is Perfect but You! We praise You and adore You forever and ever! Glory and Honor and Grace, amen.
"Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit; and there are varieties of service, but the same Lord; and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same God who empowers them all in everyone. To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good." 1 Corinthians 12:4-7
(Click on the link to worship...)
Precious cornerstone, sure foundation
You are faithful to the end
We are waiting, on You, Jesus
We believe You're all to us
Let the glory of Your name be the passion of the Church
Let the righteousness of God be a holy flame that burns
Let the saving love of Christ be the measure of our lives
We believe, You're all to us" Chris Tomlin, All to Us
