HAPPY AND BLESSED NEW YEAR'S 2010!!!

His Grace is amazing to me, I simply cannot comprehend it. Listen and worship to this song with me for a minute...click here.

New Year's Eve...a time to celebrate the year gone by and the year ahead. A time to make New Year's resolutions (for some). A time to hang out with friends and family, bringing in the new year with laughter and anticipation. Unfortunatley, this was not the case for me last year, New Year's 2009. My body, mind and spirit were absolutely consumed by fear and anxiety. Over the course of the year, God in His sovereignty brought me healing and encouragement through faithful Sisters in Christ who would keep my eyes and heart lifted upwards to my loving Father who in His great mercy and grace transformed my mind and renewed my spirit new every morning!!

I looked ahead and saw only fear, shame, lonliness and isolation. In my human eyes, 2009 would surely come to be the worst year in my life and if I was to be completely honest, I wasn't so sure if I really wanted to walk through 365 days of it. I am so glad for the patience of God and for the extra measure of it He gave me one day at a time as I woke up and tried to find joy again. One day at a time, He was steadfast, merciful, gracious, loving and purposeful. I am thankful for those precious few who covered me in prayer, who ministered to my broken heart (and mind). They were the hands and feet of God, beautiful expressions of God's Love.

Turns out 2009 was probably the richest year of my life...wow! God's plan always prevails and His ways are always perfect! We would never wish a storm to come for ourself or anyone else, however it is only after the storm when the rainbow displays it's beautiful radiance for all to see. I am so glad God brought me this storm for the rainbow of blessings that have followed. Do I pray for another stormy year...no and yes. I pray for pruning and refining in my life, knowing it may hurt sometimes but that is okay because I know God holds me and He will always do what is best to ultimately bring Him glory. Whatever 2010 brings, as long as God is with me, which He is, then I say "In Jesus Name, with God's grace and purpose-Bring it on!"

Are you or someone you know going through a storm as the New Year approaches? I encourage you: Never give up for God has a plan and purpose for you...no, you may not feel it or believe it all the time but you must trust the One who holds your very breath. Emotions and feelings can deceive you, seek truth (God and His Word) and cling to it with all you have. Never let go..He won't ever let go of you!!

With 2010 just hours away, I find myself overwhelmed with Love. In His Love, I have peace, joy, contentment, hope, laughter, and amazing grace. My spirit can't help but want to share it, we're called to share Love with others. Some people are easier to love on than others, but He calls us to Love all, for He came to rescue the broken hearted and the sinners...not the pretty ones, the rich ones, the ones we are most like. God's Love, Jesus Christ, is for ALL!!

Today is a day of praise and worship for me. With a humble and excited spirit I look forward to asking and seeking God's will each and every day, petitioning His blessings not only for me but those around me. That is my New Year's Resolution-deeper trust, greater hope, enduring faith, unmeasuable patience and acceptance of His unconditional Love.

HAPPY AND BLESSED NEW YEARS 2010 to you and yours!! You are safe in His arms. (Click here for this beautiful song and video.)

God Bless you, Michele

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~PART II

SHOULD I PRAY?? WILL YOU PRAY FOR ME??

Prayer...can He hear me? Am I "good enough" to be heard? Yes, He can hear you!! Never again will I discount the efforts of prayer of just one. I have questioned whether my single prayer would make a difference, Who am I to be praying for them? I know better than that and it has been one of Satan's lies that has had to be replaced with truth-our prayers are important, they are heard, crystal clear and with whole-hearted passion.

Sure, there are times of corporate prayer where we should gather and have multitudes to pray over us, but even just the prayer of one is mighty and powerful. There is no difference in one vs. a hundred when it comes to how God hears and answers our prayers. The way we pray, and how many pray are as individual as our spirits are from one another. It may be that through the gathering of many, another's faith will be tested or affirmed. Only God knows how far reaching the testimony can go. And yet, it may be one on one with someone who cares for you, loves you and lifts you up..God's full attention is there too. He doesn't hear you any less in your small corner of the world. One on one or one and a hundred...and this is for each one of us who call His name! Can you comprehend this??? I cannot. Wow...an amazing God amazes me continually. The more I get to know Him, I become more and more awe-struck and amazed I become.

When we interceed for another, the Holy Spirit is also with us and what greater power is there than He? God hears the cries and moans of one as loudly and clearly as the thousands. What I love about prayer is that it can be done anywhere, by anyone of any age, with any number of people. I have prayed among hundreds, tens, one on one and alone. Half the time I have been asked to pray for a need and the other half, it is the prompting of the Holy Spirit that alerts my spirit. I love when that happens! Of course, it is an absolute honor to be asked to be a prayer warrior for another but I love it when the Holy Spirit just surprises you and says "Let's pray!" Well, I say I love it...but really, I love the privilege of it and ministry of it, knowing God has included me in something bigger than me...but sometimes you don't know if your are covering an bad suation or covering a good one, so I pray God's will be done on earth as it is in Heaven followed with whatever He guides....hoping for blessings of course!

For me, there is no greater joy than to pray for another because I know that the Holy Spirit is joining me and we are talking directly to the mighty One who saves, heal, restores and loves unconditionally. We are asking favor for a life-change in someone's life...we will never know the widespread affect it can have for blessings may reach generations deep. Even in my own life, I won't fully know how this past year's journey with the Lord will impact those I minister to in my family and those He crosses my path with, then and now.

Whether it is praying for help or praying for blessing in the life of another, your heart's voice is heard. There is power available to us and how we need to be reminded of it and access it. We are called to love one another, encourage one another, building each other up...imagine if each of us really did?!?! Wow!

At The End of the Day

One of my favorite things to hear from my children is "Mommy, I Love You." And the second is "Mommy, will you hold me?" With the Christmas holidays over and new toys littering every room in the house, we have played together more in the past 2 days as a family than all month combined! Joy is in the air as we celebrate God's sweet Gift of His Son Jesus. Sure, we have enjoyed the gift exchanges and playing with new things. An amazingly hilarious game of Uno had us rolling tonight!!
This holday season between Thanksgiving and Christmas, our family has made a conscious effort to keep our focus on Christ and not on ourselves. With the pressures of media temptations and peer pressures of endulging self, it hasn't been easy to keep Jesus in the big picture, but I feel we have done pretty good, much to the frustration of the kids who can't understand why they still can't have as they wish, as their friends do. A simple reminder of their Birth Date and who's Birth Date we are celebrating this week, and we are kinda re-focused. Oh, the war between heart and mind...giving and receiving...we live in such a Gimme, Gimme, Gimme time.
Playing all day, trying out new toys, waering new clothes and eating lots and lots of sugary delights have made for some fun memories and it has been fun and meaningful. But, at the end of the day, my most precious moment is when my child says, "Mommy, will you hold me?" I have many reasons why I could say No...I have things to do to shut down the house for the night, dog needs to be let out, emails checked, lights turned off, rooms picked up, dishes sorted, I need to get ready for bed, and on and on...but my heart is touched and I say Yes. How precious to be held close by one you love and who loves you.
For me as a Mom, after a full day of 4 kids which begins very early, I am ready for alone time but there is something refreshing about that little bit of cuddle time with one of them. We may read a book, talk, sing, dance, rock in the chair (for those under 5yrs old!)and we always pray. My heart melts, it is warmed. And it's like our hearts melt together as we cuddle. And then I wonder about God, and how He must treasure when we cuddle up to Him, setting aside all the distractions around us, and rest in His arms, His warm embrace. To be still and be held...to be accepted and loved. He is never too busy or too tired to hold me. Praise Him!!
After a full day of dancing, playing, praising, enjoying life, maybe even making some mistakes, how it must warm our Heavenly Father's heart to embrace His children at the end of the day. To stop and be still and rest. As I hold my child, I fill with joy, love and thanksgiving-my cup overflows. I gaze down in their sweet face and see joy, love and thanksgiving as they are embraced by me. We are both blessed.
I pray that as much as I can comprehend what love is by the love I experience with my own child, that the Lord would be blessed by my worship-not only during the times I dance, sing, act or serve on His behalf, but when I come to rest in worship, laying my head at His chest, feeling His peacful and warm embrace, that He would receive my love for Him and that I too, would accept and embrace His love for me, at the end of the day..."Father, I love You...Abba Daddy God, will you hold me?"

Thank You Lord that now matter what kind of day I have, whether full of joy or pain, busyness or laziness, that You are with me every step of the way. I thank You for accepting me on my good days and my bad days. There is nothing more special to me than resting in You at the end of my day. Lord, help me to love others around me like You do, give me Your eyes to see what You see. Help me encourage those who need it. Help me love those who seem unloveable.
Thank You Father for the Gift of Your Son in my life. I want to fully embrace Your love for me. Fill my cup overflowing so that those whom You bring into my life may see You and come to know You. Bind Satan from stealing my peace and my joy, my assurance and my strength, my security in You so that I may endure each new day's temptations and trials. Father, thank You for holding me and sometimes even carrying me along the path of life. My hearts melts with Yours as I rest in You. Thank You for receiving my love and for loving me as You do. Amen.

Welcome!

Welcome to my blog! Recently Where do I even begin?!? This blog is the first stone of what I pray is many more living stones to come.
God has given me a few opportunities to share with others-you may be one of them-what the Lord has done for me in 2009. The blog was created as a venue to share my testimony with more of you. All the while I thought I was odd man out only to find out I am not the only one with issues. Truthfully, I really don't even want to share the fact I have issues, much less share the issues! However, there is such a freedom in bringing darkness into the Light, because a spark can start a roaring fire and this is my prayer. That might little spark in my little world will help spread His Light.
WARNING: This blog is not full of doctrinal insights or deep theology. I certainly don't have a degree in Bible knowledge or am Queen of "knowing it all," far from it!! As you read, you will learn more about me and where I have walked. This is simply my journaling of my experiences, through my imperfect eyes-as I walk with my God. I may not ever fully get what it is that He wants me to get but I pray daily asking Him to show me and teach me, guiding my steps for that day. It is my heart's desire that as you read this blog that it will not be about my "issues" of anxiety, panic, fear, insecurity, insignificance but that through these hindrances and weakness which I have dealt with that you will see God's grace, mercy, compassion, and LOVE! 
No matter where you are in your life, where you have been, what you have been through, the bad things that have been done to you, you are where you are because God has allowed it...it's your life and no one elses is like it. God has a specific plan and purpose for you and each day He is near. One thing I have learned hard, is how Great is Our God and He is greater than he who is in the world!!! Absolute Truth! Even if you are not a Believer in Jesus Christ or maybe you have distanced yourself for whatever reason, do you know He is still there directing your way? You cannot run away from God or hide from Him for He even hears your very thoughts. He wants you to return to Him and be in His fellowship, under His protection so that He can give you His best blessings. He ordained your due date here on earth and He has ordained your due date before Him. He stands patiently waiting for your return to Him. Won't you go?!
We all have a story to share. If your heart is pitter-pattering and your lungs fill with each breath, then you are living in this life (dah! simple truth we need to be reminded of); you are traveling on a journey, you are on a path, you are constantly making choices (good and bad) which affect where you are going. Not every decision we make will always be the right one or most beneficial for us, but God is gracious and His mercies are new every morning. There is no way to change where you have already been which resulted from the decisions you have already made, but you can choose today where you will go and how you will get there.
Accepting He Loves you completely, unconditionally- just the way you are and trusting His Love and acceptance of you is how you get to where He wants you to go. Walking in hope- through faith- in believing.
As you read my testimony, I encourage you to think about your testimony...who you are, spiritually, emotionally and physically. You have a purpose too. Please consider how God is using you, in your circumstances to reveal Himself not only to you but those in your family, those around you, in each divine encounter, every single day. Your spark can start a fire! How grateful I am for the precious warrior women God sent to intercede on my behalf when I had no strength, no hope, no perseverance.    Thank God for faithful ones, warrior ones! How I pray this blog will provide encouragement for you as I seek to stack my living stones, one entry at a time, one coal into the Fire Bowl at a time!
Let's get started!! Hugs and Blessings for stopping by!

Father God, use this blog, use my life, my testimony to bring others closer to You. May Your truths and Your unconditional Love be revealed despite my humanness. God, You are bigger than words. You are life itself. Father, thank You for Loving me and accepting me...help me to Love You more, receive Your Love and acceptance of who I am in You. God I am nothing without You. In You alone, I know there is healing, hope, joy and peace. Even in the worst of times, You are faithful in Love. You are unmovable and I trust You when my world seems unsteady. In Jesus Name, I ask for more of You in my life and for all who seek You. Bind Satan from blinding and deafening us, from all distractions. Thank You God. Amen!

Happy Anniversary

One year ago today my life radically changed. As much as it took a turn for the worse, it was also God's design for my best. One year ago today, God allowed me to begin a process in my life of pain to praise. It was extremely painful, frightening, lonely, frustrating, desperate and fearful.

As I look back over this past year, I am amazed at what God has done for me. Never before have I been more in love with my Jesus, my Lord and my Father, my Rock and Redeemer. I have known about Him, learned about Him and studied Him since the very beginning of my life being raised in church by my parents. I acknowledged the Gift He gave to me on Calvery, I accepted His Gift and His Friendship. But for the most part, God and I had a working relationship. Oh, I loved Him, don't get me wrong, and I knew He loved me...enough to die for me. He was the One I went to when I needed something, or if I was interceeding for someone else's needs. Our relationship wasn't intimate as some would describe. I acknowledge His incredible gift and sacrifice for me, and yet I didn't personally feel connected to Him. People described Him as Alive, and I knew in Biblical terms He has risen from the dead, therefore He is alive, but I couldn't have said He was alive in me. I didn't hear Him or feel Him. I simply went to Him, believing and trusting He heard me. Also believing that I needed to watch myself because He disciplined those who didn't serve Him well. Satan ran with that one. Inadequacy

It wasn't until this year's journey that the Lord showed me one layer at a time Who He was, Who He desired to be to me, that He did not want or need me to be His partner. God showed me that He wants to be my EVERYTHING!!!...My Provider when I have a need. My Counselor when I don't know what to do. My Rock, My Strength when I am weak. My Courage when I am fearful. My Joy when I am full of sorrow and pain. My Forgiveness when I am angry. My Peace when I am shaken and anxious. My Hope when I am devestated or lonely. My Father when I need assurance and direction. My Rock when I am uncertain and scared. My Healer when my body, mind and spirit are plagued. My Eyes and Ears when I am blind and deaf towards Him. My Redeemer when I fail. My Judge and My Comfort when I have been wronged. My Truth when I am being deceived. He wants my heart to belong completely to Him, trusting He is Who He says He is, trusting that He will be my Strength in my weakness; He accepts me and forgives me completely!

This process of acceptance has been a long one and I am still working on it. As someone with the gift of Encouragement, it's easy for me to give grace to others, accept others in their good and their bad, but for me to accept me, to accept grace for me, to accept help, encouragement, love and gifts from others...not easy. Most of my life has been lived in a One Way Street, flowing outwardly. This is where God has me now.

It has taken this past year to free me from the bondage of fear, now to move on in the refining process of sanctification, I am learning and growing more and more in the Love of God's grace and Love.

A year ago today, my life was good...busy, homeschooling the older boys, in the midst of the holiday and birthday seasons, family was good, friends were good, typical, average, stay at home Mom life...nothing to complain about....except that I sure felt busy, I had little time for me and in that there was no time for God but I had wished there was. My only option was to get up earlier in the morning and I just couldn't imagine doing that when I was already prying myself out of bed as it was! One day, I thought, I will have more time for God, studying His Word, serving Him, praying.

I am so thankful God heard my thoughts and He loved me enough to call me out! No more waiting-He must have figured I was ready-NOW was a good time to meet Him face to face! And boy did I!

Milestones: although each day was a beautiful milestone and God revealed Himself to me each new day, there were big dates I will forever remember...

December 6, 2008 was the day my life will forever be marked by change-the day of desperation. A few weeks later, I didn't think I could live this new life I had been given for it was full of fear.

January 1, 2009 looking ahead to a New Year, my year looked dismal. I was frightened and angry.

April 4, 2009 after walking through the process of healing for 4 months, felt purpose and healthy, victorious as I celebrated my Birthday with thanksgiving and joy, with a hope for my future, believing and trusting God had a plan and purpose for this journey He had me on.

June 2009 first step in a plane, confirming chains were broken, the chains of fear were being broken! AMEN!

November 14, 2009 stepped onto a "real" plane for the first time in a year. AMEN! He loudly proclaimed His grace was enough...even for Me-Michele! AMEN AMEN!! Goliath was down!

November 21, 2009 Goliath was beheaded, the bondage of fear had been replaced with courage.

Today, December 6, 2009 I reflect back with a grateful heart to my God Who loved me enough to allow me to hurt a little, a lot actually, so that He could bless me a lot! I am grateful for His patience in waiting for me to seek Him to be more than just my Helper and Partner in life-but desiring Him as my Daily Bread, my Life Giver and Sustainer- to be my All in All. Giving thanks to the Sisters in my life who were His hands and feet, holding me up when I was weak, stood in the gap, who anointed and prayed over me and for me faithfully over the past year. Thankful for a husband who stayed by my side, learning as I learned one step at a time, encouraging me to keep moving forward. And for the gift of my children who kept me plenty distracted, in a good way, and for making me laugh, sharing warm embraces and seeing me with loving, adoring eyes despite what I felt inside.

If you know Him and yet are not feeling Him working and moving in your heart, your spirit, I would encourage you to open God's living word and study. I was never a reader growing up but the living word is vibrant, life changing, vivid, action packed, encouraging, full of wisdom and love, written by the One Who love you more than life-He gave His One and Only Son's life for yours! He loves you sooo much and He wants to be your EVERYTHING!!! Won't you let Him? Do NOT WAIT another day, for you only have today, tomorrow is not guaranteed! Mark TODAY as the first day of your 180 with God! Seek Him, Hear Him, Feel Him, Trust Him with your heart. Accept His Love.

John 3:16 & I Thess 5:16-18

God Bless You!!! Michele

Silly moments in Honduras 2009

Family lunch silliness video. Kids love stare contests and Corey has his own little parties!!!

Flight & Fight Week

For nearly a year, I had stressed and feared flying on a plane again. Having the panic attack on that plane caused me such fear to fly again. It had become my Goliath. I swore I would never fly again. The degree of fear certainly had decreased each passing month as I handed the anxiety over to God and trust Him to provide the very breath I needed but it remained a threat of bondage to me that I knew had to be broken. It was time.
Our family typically takes one big travel vacation for the week but this year, plans were on hold because of the trials I was facing with my fear that flying would trigger in me. April was a huge turning point but I admit that I still feared the plane...would I ever get back on one? Would we ever travel as we always had? Will I continue to allow this to be bondage for me? Would I allow this to keep me from going where God called me? With praise and thanksgiving and determination...perserverance- I said NO!! I will not be bound.
My husband and I decided to take down this Goliath who continued to taunt me. We had hoped to keep the planned a trip out of the country for Thanksgiving, a 2.5 hr flight we had taken many times. Every day I prayed over this upcoming flight. Then I thought, you know, a test flight would be good. The shortest and cheapest thing I could do was a round trip to Austin. So, the hubby and I had a Date!
I had it all planned out-good diet, healthy lifestyle, extra bible study time, anointing oils and lots of prayers. I had my Holy To Do List in preparation of the big-little flight. That was MY plan...notice the list of my works. Unfortunately but fortunately, the flu swept over my two big boys and then me! Needless to say, I didn't feel like eating anything, much less a salad, fever kept me from the gym and fatigue and headaches kept me from the study and prep time I was counting on to get me through this upcoming war with Goliath. I became a little anxious in my inability to start my flight against Goliath by way of preparation. Here was the next big...huge step to getting myself prepared for the biggest test of my life and I could do nothing!! I tried to read and study, but I absolutely couldn't, I had nothing in me.
I pleaded with God Why...don't You want me to do all of this so I can be successful? What am I doing wrong here? This is when He spoke to me. That still small voice I knew was now a clear directive voice.
It was through these moments He laid a foundation for me to learn "surrender." I never really understood the depth of surrender, being at the complete end of self until this season of having no other option but to surrender. Here I lay sick in bed with nothing to give, being forced into surrender. I trust He knew my heart, my desire to do right and earn my weight of protection and provision but is not the economy of God. I would come to learn trust and grace through surrender. So often I think He forces us into the places we have no access to self, to show us He is all we need, and He is able. He helps us in these moments to see He is more than we can imagine. Trusting His grace was enough and understanding the power was not in myself, but Him. I got it. I got surrender. When you stop acting, doing and you lay bare, you have nothing, there you have surrender.
Friday came and I began to feel better, focus and energy returned. I had a good Bible study and a meaningful prayer time finally. Saturday morning of the test flight to Austin, I woke up feeling great! I was sooo glad, admittedly though I was nervous that I would not be successful because I felt I hadn't done what I thought needed to be done in order to have victory. My thoughts went to trying to figure out what I would do when I was being defeated. I honestly didn't think it was going to go well and yet, I sure had hoped my little bit would be enough.
Today is THE day...I was going to get up early and had planned to double up on missed Bible studies...earning my right to receive His grace and peace. (And...another lesson to be learned here.) As I rolled out of bed, I felt the prompting to lay back down. What?? No way!! I am NOT going to miss today's Bible study of all days. Are you kidding me?!?! Today is crucial I make up for lost time. I sat up again and once again I felt God saying lay back down. So I relunctantly did. I was completely baffled as to why He wouldn't want me to get up and study, showing my worthiness. I laid still and prayed, not understanding why I was laying there, kind of mad if I am honest because what could possibly be accomplished by laying back down and praying, and praying for what at that point?!? Was it me wanting to be lazy, was it Satan wanting me to stay in bed another day or was it really God? It was sooooo hard for me to lay there and not get up to take action. I have since learned more about the powerful weapon of prayer, and this was the season I was learning it. I prayed more, over the day, over me, over my husband over the fear all the while wanting to get out of that bed and do something off my list!
As my anxiety and nervousness rose, I began in the pleading of help to rescue me from the defeat I assumed was to be mine when I faced Goliath unprepared and ill-equipped. He gently reminded me about surrender. Taking deeper breaths, I laid there in an attempt to settle down and hand it all over to Him as He has been revealing to me all week prior to this morning. I prayed, confessing my works based faith and the trust I was actually placing in myself instead of Him. All week I had planned on earning and making myself a success against taking down Goliath. God stepped in and basically rescued me from myself while taking away any bragging rights I may have had. I would have nothing to show for my part other than faith by surrender. All the power and victory would be because of His doing. Not mine.
I couldn't get out of bed. I laid silent, listening for more, waiting for the release to go and do. Minutes later, I asked again, why it was that He still had me there, what else am I to hear or get or say. Meanwhile, He could hear all the other stuff in my head of defeat, fear of what was an obvious loss, wondering how I would handle the upcoming flight unprepared, fearing if this whole flying life would never really happen. I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, conceding to the moment. And He answered.  " I won't drop you."
That's it...I was speechless...it was not the profound statement you would imagine God to say but He knew my inner thoughts. He knows my deepest fears and He addressed them. I knew exactly what He meant and I had great comfort and peace because of it...it was His word to me. It was God loving me, accepting me, forgiving me and promising to not forsake me...He won't drop me. This is why I was to remain in bed. I would not have been listening for Him if I was busy studying and working out, I wouldn't have sat still long enough knowing I had so much to do to have heard Him.
All that time, God was teaching me...waiting for me to surrender...then to be still...then to listen...then to accept His word and trust it.
I got up out of bed, got the kids to school, had a sweet prayer time that morning and danced in worship. I was ready for the flight, feeling encouraged, covered and equipped with truth and Grace. Off to the airport we went! Peace filled me and fear fled. Yes, I was nervous but not consumed. My husband was a rock to me too. This was a different journey for Him watching His wife navigate this season of fear and faith.
Our little flight was awesome! We enjoyed a few hours of layover time to have lunch with our daily who lives there and we returned back home before the kids got out of school! His grace WAS enough-He didn't drop me!
Next step was the 2.5 hr flight one week away. What joy to be free from the bondage of fear. I say with confidence it has no hold over me-PRAISE GOD ALMIGHTY!! It was nothing of me but all of Him-my Rock and Refuge, my Strength and Sustainer! I simply let it all go and made the choice to surrender to Him my fear, my anxiety and place complete trust in Him, by faith alone. It has been baby steps of trust and faith throughout the entire year. I say that in April I was free, but I still feared the plane...I was just in the process, one step, a big step closer to freedom!
I am sooooo human...you would think I would never, ever, ever, fear or doubt again and yet I found myself still anxious about the big flight.
Temptation to work my list the next week was there, but I stayed focused on surrender and trust. I was encouraged by my mentor to write a letter of thanksgiving to God recalling the many times He has provided. It brought tears to my eyes when I recounted the many times He has heard my cries for help and met me with His comforting arms. How He has carried me along lonely paths, never leaving my side. The fact that He has stood by my side despite my failings, accepting me just as I was in that moment, brought me adoration for the sweet and gracious God I love and serve.
I choose to live out the coming week in an attitude of thanksgiving, peace and joy in complete surrender knowing and trusting He will provide just the right portion of just what I need just when I needed it. I will continue, by faith and Grace to conquer Goliath in his many schemes and taunts against me. I am getting lots of practice to learn about Grace, hope, faith, trust, patience, acceptance. Our faith is not about our worthiness, or our ability to perform or work. Faith is about Grace. My God is awesome and it is Christ alone any of us can have victory, not of ourselves, lest any one boast! I eagerly await every next flight, arming myself with His armor through my surrender and obedience, covered and led by Grace! He is everything and all in all. Rest in His care. He won't drop you!

My heart's prayer tonight~
"God, you are more than enough for me. Your portions of what we need whether it be grace, love, peace, joy, assurance or be it discipline are always enough for me. Your ways are perfect, help me to simply trust Your timing, Your ways so that You may be glorified, not of myself for I am nothing without you. Lord, may You allow me the honor and blessing to share this with others who need encouragement in their life, what they are facing. I may be able to hide my inner thoughts from those around me and even from my own self, but You are in my deepest thoughts. You can see what no other can. Only You can reach in and pull out the gunk within, transforming it into something fruitful.
God I pray You would continue to mold me into what it is You created me for. I believe I am here for a purpose so I ask and submit to the plan You have for me whatever it is, mold me. Move me out of the way, help me to continue to trust You. When tempting thoughts of fear and doubt approach would You bind them and cast them as far as the east is from the west.
For those who are hurting or facing difficult circumstances, would You step into their heart, souls and minds, reveal Yourself to them, drawing them closer to Your cup of grace and love. Cleanse them and purify them so that with You Lord, they would become more than they could ever be on their own. Show them the power of prayer and surrender. Teach them Grace.
For those who are lost and don't know you, God, remove their blindness, open their hearts and minds to You, Your truth. May they see Your Light through each of us who belong to You. The smallest flicker of the smallest light can penetrate darkness, illuminating the Light. If not I, then someone, something, Lord awaken their spirits, bring them out of the darkness, bring them back to You as you died for each one of them just as You died for me. Guide us in our circle of influences, teach us how to encourage, how to love, how to forgive the people in our lives who have hurt us and intercede for those who live in darkness. Give us a renewed passion to pray for them and love them just as You have shown Your great love for us.
In Your Son's redeeming and sweet name I pray, I seek and I knock at Your Heavenly door. I love you Father God, my awesome Rock, The Living Truth, my perfect Portion, amen!!"